The hardest thing to do is wonder what comes next.
From the constants of death and fighting, endless suffering and crying, there comes a moment where the thought comes across: What next?
As a soldier you do what your told, you follow orders no matter what, regardless how bad they seem right?
You go through with them.
That ideal of living just never seemed right, not when we've lost so many. We've lost brothers, sisters, friends and family. Everyone we've known has been put in danger while we were here.
So comes the thought of what is to arrive next. Do you continue fighting for a cause that seems unwinnable or do you abandon it despite not knowing what would happen if you didn't.
I'm conflicted. This way of living just grows numb with my emotions. Death hardly hurts me now, I don't shed tears when it happens, I don't feel guilt when they tell me who died. Nothing.
Yet, it's how I- no, it's how we've lived. This constant lifestyle, this never ending cycle, this eternal war against life itself.
How do you continue on like this? How can anybody continue to live like that?
You take it. You accept it. Death is permanent no matter what anyone says. Once you're done with it all, you look down at your two legs and just walk forward.
If you don't have legs, you crawl with your arms. You do whatever it takes to move on because you can't just sit down and sulk.
You continue to fight for them, you continue on with them. Not just in your memory but with your spirit...
So.
Keep moving forward...
To Roi, Cliff, Eragon, and the others whom have fallen
