Nothing's Gonna Hurt You - e.d

HI - welcome to my fan fic lol. Please read this with caution if you are triggered by mentions of abuse, self harm, suicide, depression and anxiety. 

AND PLEASE LISTEN TO THE SONG NOTHING'S GONNA HURT YOU BY CIGARETTES AFTER SEX WHILE READING THIS BECAUSE THAT'S THE SONG THIS FAN FIC IS BASED ON LOL

Thank you for reading! <3

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I sat on the floor with my back against the locked door, listening to the horrifying sounds of my parents fighting once again.

I hoped that my dad wouldn't try to take his anger out on me, although I knew it was unlikely that I would get out of this situation without a few bruises.

Closing my eyes, I focused on my breathing and put on my headphones, trying to block out the only reminders that I existed.

All I needed was my music. Nothing else.

----

"I swear I've never seen her speak to anyone."

Walking down the school halls was not the easiest.

Again, my headphones hugged my head as my hood covered my eyes. I didn't dare to look up.

What would I wanna look at anyway?

Watching my feet as I dragged them along the floor was much more entertaining than seeing the judgmental faces that glared at me, analyzing me carefully, noting all of my imperfections.

But of course, I didn't care, right? What was the point?

These people had no idea why I was like this, what shit I went through at home. And they weren't worth the breath I would waste trying to enlighten them on it either.

I had one place to be, class. Then, I could fuck off out of this place and finally be alone, where the only person judging me was myself. 

But god how I judged myself.

The only thing silencing my mind enough for me to cope was my music, hence why I always had my headphones on. It makes sense, right?

RING

The bell rang just in time for me to walk into my first class, English.

I always particularly liked this class, I was never too bad at writing or reading. I quite enjoyed it actually. Out of the few things I enjoyed.

The truth was, I didn't really enjoy much. I just hated some things less than others.

"So class! I'm happy to announce that today we will be welcoming a new student, Ethan Dolan."

Eh. Just another new kid.

I kept my eyes glued to the desk, knowing that this was no more interesting than tracing the gray lines on my paper with my tired eyes.

"Ethan, if you could take a seat next to..." the teacher started, darting her bright eyes around the room as I prayed they would not land on the empty space next to mine.

"next to y/n, that would be great!"

Of course.

I rolled my eyes and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. I just wanted to get this class over with.

Keeping my head down, I listened carefully to the teacher that didn't really know what she was talking about - it was all books and stuff that we all knew she'd never read.

"This will be done in partners please, so work with the person next to you for this task. And talk QUIETLY please. You have ten minutes."

I had to socialise? Are you kidding me?

The class started to chat amongst themselves as I felt a pair of eyes draw their attention to me.

It wasn't a feeling I was unfamiliar with, obviously, but I didn't want to ignore it.

"Hi, I'm Ethan." I heard as, reluctantly, I turned my small body towards the new boy, casting my eyes up to see...

probably the most gorgeous boy I had ever seen.

For 16, his appearance was pretty impressive.

He had these glistening hazel eyes, the eyes that I could get lost in. The eyes that one day would watch the luckiest girl in the world.

That adorable button nose, and those plump, red lips.

His jawline was sharp, it looked as though it could cut diamonds. 

His dark, long hair flopped messily, but not messily in a bad way. The kind of messily that looked just perfect. The kind of messily that looked like it was placed perfectly, strand by strand, by the soft hands of an angel.

He put his hand out, dragging me back into my not so realistic reality, motioning for me to shake it.

"I-I'm y/n." I managed to stutter out, putting forward my small, pale hand and shaking his, which was much bigger than mine. 

He shakes hands? I haven't seen that in a while.

Somehow, this boy I had barely met had made me feel more than anyone had in years. I felt so nervous, yet so alive. So scared, yet so intrigued. 

Then he smiled, and damn, that smile. I swear it could bring a dead puppy back to life. That smile could light up the darkest room in the universe. The smile wasn't huge, but boy did it have a huge impact on me. It was a weak smile, a kinda "hey" smile, but it felt almost as if he had just given me a huge, warm hug.

"Hey y/n. It's nice to meet you. I love your name."

"Th-thank you... I love yours too." I replied with a slightly less forced smile, still making sure to keep my head down in order to hide my face.

And with that, we got on with the work. Although we talked about books and stuff, by the time the teacher told us to quiet down, it felt like I knew everything about him.

Was I really this obsessed with a boy I had just met? I had to calm down. This was getting creepy.

But in reality, he gave me a reason to want to look up. He gave me a reason to want to smile, he gave me a reason to want people to... I don't know, see me as a person. But I was just getting ahead of myself. I hadn't had people show much kindness to me in a while, especially not someone this beautiful, and I guess I just got a bit excited.

RING

And just like that, class was over.

I let out a small sigh, what I know was a bit more than a small part of me hoping that this class could last just a little longer. The new boy had this kind of aura to him, being around him made you feel more, I don't know, comfortable. I could tell he was going to be popular, especially with the girls.

And he wouldn't wanna know me, just like everyone else.