Flashback when you met me

Dancing Is Not Cheating

May 2, 2016 in New York
Met Gala "Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Age of Technology"

I was supposed to go the Met Gala with Adam but he is on tour in Europe. I was sitting here alone. Just me and my thoughts. I didn't even notice the handsome boy across the room. He has beautiful blue eyes and he is right looking at me. It feels like there is just us in this crowded room. His face looks familiar. I think his name is: "Joe.... A... Alwyn." I met him at one of Gigi's parties. He was modeling for her quite a few times. He was pretty handsome back then but I shouldn't have this thoughts about him. I'm with Adam and I love him. At least I did. Our relationship was going down after he left for tour 3 months ago. That does not make it okay Taylor even though I know the break up will come. Very soon.

"Hey babe, wanna dance?", a man asks me. It's Tom Hiddleston. The question is actually to casual in my opinion. But Adam is not here and I'm bored and dancing is not cheating.

"Yeah sure."

I need to stop dancing with him. I already saw to many phones up filming us. I know that the videos will be all over the internet tomorrow. And I don't want Adam to think I'm cheating on him while he's around the globe. I have to admit though dancing with Tom was much fun. He's so nice and such a gentlemen. He's very attractive too. This is not the way I should be thinking about him or any other man except for Adam.

I'm back at my seat. Staring into my phone. I'm checking the Instagram to see if there are already video up of me and Tom dancing. Fortunately I can't find any.
Sometimes I think I'm insane. Is it possible to like three men at the same time?

I scan the room to look for Joe. Don't ask why I just feel the need to find him and I don't know. I find him at the bar staring at me. He's so beautiful. I feel the need to be near him. My hands are literally shaking from holding back from him. I want to go over to him but I can't. I just don't want more 'drama' today. I already danced with Tom which probably will cause me a lot of trouble. If I go over to another man and the media sees it they will label me as a 'slut' and I really don't want that. His stare is so intense. Too intense. I'm getting more and more nervous. Come on am I a teenage girl having her first crush? No! I'm a grown ass woman! When I see him coming over I just run. I do not actually run I just walk fast but you know what I mean. Very grown up, Taylor.
I need to talk to Adam now. I need to tell him. Tell him what? I did not do anything wrong. Dancing is not cheating neither is looking at someone. I can't help but still feel guilty about it. I'm looking for the exit. I spot it across the room. On my way out I'm looking for his number in my phone. I'm so concentrated that I accidentally run into someone.

"Sorry", he says with a heavy British accent. It's Joe.

"No.. Uhm.. Yeah I'm sorry. I...", I stumble. I hate how I feel about him. He makes me so nervous all the damn time. I can't have these kinds feelings. No. I run outside as fast as I can this time I'm literally running. He tries to reach for my hand as I'm running away but I just ignore him. His magnetic field is too strong. I need to stay away from him.

The fresh air feels so good. I take a few deep breaths. I'm too agitated to talk to Adam now. I need to calm down before I go back in.
_______________________________________This is going to be a longer story. I know I used a bit too many Taylor references but that was not my intention. It just fits. I hope you enjoy the story so far. Next chapter coming soon. PS Wattpad deleted my first draft of this first chapter. The original was a bit different and kind of better but you can't change what happend 🤷‍♀️