Terrible Things [h.s.]

Chapter Six

Songs for this chapter are:

>Bulletproof Love- Pierce The Veil

>Like a Knife- Secondhand Serenade

>My Beautiful Rescue- This Providence

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Afterwards, we laid there on the couch.

Happiness doesn't begin to describe what I felt in that moment. It was me and him now, forever. We were a team, inseparable. We gave each other parts of ourselves that nobody else had ever had before, parts we could never get back. I wish I could live in that moment forever, but no, time is going to catch up to us soon. But for now, time doesn't matter. It's us.

Just me and him, the rising and falling of his bare chest. My head in the crook between his shoulder and neck, my body a blanket over his.

Harry shifted over a little so I was not so on top of him anymore. My body slid down next to his, and my head rested on his chest.

"Can I tell you something?" Harry asked in a hushed voice, almost a whisper.

"Anything, anything at all," I said.

"Right before we got together," he took a shaky breath and continued. "Right before we got together, I was going to kill myself. Literally, right before. I was going to do it that night. When you called me, I was about to text you, tell you I loved you before I left. And you.. You saved me, Moon."

I let out a breath I didn't realize I had been holding. With that breath, tears began streaming down my face.

He was going to leave.

He was going to die.

He would be dead if it weren't for me. For us.

"I.. I'm so sorry, Harry."

I wish I had been there for him earlier. I wish that he had never had a suicidal thought. I wish I had been there to hold him every time he needed me. I wish I had gotten to him sooner, saved him even a little bit of pain.

"No no no, baby girl, you don't have anything to be sorry for. You saved me, remember? You saved me, you saved me.."

*Flash Forward*

My hands gripped the edge of the sink as I took in my reflection. I looked beaten, tired. I was.

Five days? More like five years. Any time without him was too much time.

He was still coming around, though I can't figure out why.

I feel hopeless, and damn shitty. There's nothing left for me to hold on too. Niall and Willow are begging me to just let it go and move on. They don't understand. I had my life taken away. My love for him was forever, I meant it. I will always love him, and I will never have him again.

I will never hold him again. He will never kiss my forehead again. He will never tell me he loves me again. We will never talk about having a family again. Never.

"I do not love you anymore," he says.

"You'll be fine without me," he says.

"I do not want to be with you," he says.

I'm done. I'm tired. And I love him. I hate him. He is the best thing that ever happened to me. The worst thing that ever happened to me. He gave me life. He's going to be the destruction of me.

As you probably guessed, no, he did not take me back. He just sat there, watched me cry. I begged, I screamed, I cried, and it didn't affect him. I don't doubt that he doesn't love me anymore. It must be true.

I bring myself back to the present. I shake my head at my reflection and walk out of the bathroom, leaving a pool of blood in the sink and a burning sensation on my skin.

Oops.

Authors note

I give you all permission to murder me.

I am so sorry for taking so long to update. My head has been so scattered lately, I always forget. And I know this chapter is short and sucky but I'm just really trying to get my head together. Thank you all for being patient with me.

I love you all, my beautiful readers.