||Anxciet|| Sorry {1}

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Warning - slight panic attack, self hate, angst

Today was a quiet day, Virgil was alone in the mind — at least he thought so. Virgil walked down stairs searching for the other sides and having no success in finding them. He smiled softly at himself and raced to his room and ran over to piano — leaving the door slightly open.

He closed his eyes as his fingers glided across the piano keys. A small hum irrupted from his throat and he swayed to the beat of the piano.

I've missed your calls for months it seems
Don't realize how mean I can be
'Cause I can sometimes treat the people
That I love like jewelry
'Cause I can change my mind each day
I didn't mean to try you on
But I still know your birthday
And your mother's favorite song

Virgil shut his eyes tighter as his finger kept gliding across the piano keys. He knew the beat and piano keys to the song like the back of his hand so he kept his eyes shut and swayed back and forth to the rhythm.

So I'm sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe that anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me
Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things that we had behind

Singing this song always reminded Virgil of a certain side — him. That thought of him alone made Virgils heart flutter but now... his eyes had tears threatening to fall. He missed him, he truly did and he could help a slight sob escape his lips.

Oh
Oh
Oh

Virgils tears made everything blurry but he didn't pay attention to that and kept singing.

I run away when things are good
And never really understood
The way you laid your eyes on me
In ways that no one ever could
And so it seems I broke your heart
My ignorance has struck again
I failed to see it from the start
And tore you open 'til the end

Virgils sobbed more as his fingers shook. His mind raced with the memories he shared with him. Why was he crying? He should care. Sure Virgil and he had a good relationship but that was once upon a time and it would never happen again. Virgil ran away like a coward so why would he want him back? Virgil shook and his voice cracked but he continued singing.

And I'm sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe that anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me
Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things that we had behind

Virgil took a deep breath and exhaled trying to regain at least his vision.

And someone will love you
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me

Virgil truly believe he deserves someone better, smeone stronger, someone handsome, someone smart, not some ugly, skinny, stupid, depressed, emo, like himself.

Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry that I can't believe that anybody ever really
Starts to fall in love with me
Sorry to my unknown lover
Sorry I could be so blind
Didn't mean to leave you
And all of the things that we had behind

Virgils tears couldn't stop now nor could his fingers. Whenever the anxious male was feeling sad he would play his piano, guitar, or violin but even if he started crying he wouldn't stop. Music had always been his passions and ruining a song over his stupid emotions weren't ideal — in his mind.

And someone will love you
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me
And someone will love you
Someone will love you
Someone will love you
But someone isn't me

And that was the end of the song. His fingers stopped and he quickly slapped a hand over his mouth trying to conceal the sobs that yearned to yell out. He curled up in his piano chair and sobbed quietly into his sleeves. His eye shadow leaving black streaks as tear fell.

"Virgil?" A voice asked.

Oh no. Virgil though to himself. The one person he though to avoid. The one person he loved and still loves. And the one person the could make Virgils heart flutter.

"J - Janus?"
•••
A/N:

It's 1 AM and I sincerely don't know what I'm doing. I just saw many people writing one-shots on Virgil singing and I've been trying to do it myself but I have horrible writing skills. Originally, I was going to make this Prinxiety but I felt this song was a better fit for Anxciet maybe Dukexiey but the last chapter was angsty Anxciet and I wanted to mend that. This is part 1 — yeah I know it's amgsty but I've also been in a angsty mood too. Part 2 should be outages today or maybe tomorrow, I don't know. I have pretty busy schedule with school and graduation is coming so I need to improve my grade. However, part 2 will be fluff. Hope you understand. Till next time, lovelies :)

~ Lia

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