Pulling me in like that

(0,N/2-0.1)

"Guccieee," Can tried, "go bed Gucieee"
"Babieeeee" he moved a soft hand over his back.

Nope. There seemed to be no moving this fluffy pancake tiny blanket.

"I just want you to get your warm REM sleep..." he took his hand off Gucci and blankly stared into the ceiling.

"I wanna take care of you because...I care for you." Can voiced, as if analyzing his own behavior.

"And I really don't want to hurt you..." he muttered into the darkness.

"Am I-" he turned to Gucci, "Am I doing it wrong?"

"But you have so many friends!" Can reasoned. Noooo Gucci, Gucci reasoned. In spite of being asleep, in Can's voice.

"Hmm...maybe I've never been a good friend and they all lied to me because they are good friends and they don't want to hurt me."

"But then how are you a bad friend if you don't want to hurt them either?"

"Oh Gucci! You're too smart for me..."

Can looked back up. Eyes beginning to haze out in the mist of confusion.

"But- if I was that bad...he wouldn't have waited around for so long to tell me that. He's such an asshole! We would've fought over it or something...its been a while since we fought over something...its been a while sine we actually fought...I was so happy...things were getting better...we were hanging out more...watching movies together...he-"

Can turned to his confidant again.

"He even told me he was courting me Guccieee."

"Whaaa why didn't you tell me?"

"Tsk. I'm telling you right now."

"Hmph. Fine. Go on."

"So then- basically, he doesn't wanna be friends...so he definitely doesn't like me. But-then-why court me? Why tell me you like me? Gucci you know we even-"

He touched his lips.

"We even-"

That hickey flashed before his eyes that-
Intense internal screaming ensued.
He took a deep breath.

"Maybe I'm just too whiny..."
"But that was internal."
"Cuz you're asleep duuuh."
"Oh really! Then why aren't you whispering?"
"I just feel like talking in a verrrry low volume is less loud than whispering."
"Oooo Interesting. And thanks. And I love you."
"I love you toooo~"

"And yes. You are whiny and loud, but it's not that bad. Techno once even said it suits your monkey personality."

"Hmm..." Can blinked hard, the fog of confusion was rising again. "But come on, it's Techno...you know he's too sweet hurt anybody anyway..."

Another deep breath, a little shuddery this time.

"I think...like- I'm just- this-turd thingy...this whiny little turd thingy that he just-"

He looked further away from Gucci, he didn't want him to hear this,

"He just wanted to throw away..."

And his eyes shot wide open.

And the room fell silent.

And it stayed there for a while.

How could he not see it coming? It was right there. It had been. All along.

And tonight, it held him by the ankles and dragged him through that thick fog of confusion- to what his heart saw amidst that warm darkness and to what bitter nothings the rain seemed to be whispering through the window and...

And his breath shuddered at what the midnight had him to.

"You-you just wanted to do away with me. Didn't you, Tin?"

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nnNNOOOOOOOOO

Get up Gucci! our baby needs us!