I Can't Go Back Now (Supernatural- Alexis Hammel)

Desperation At Its Finest

Me and Dean sit beside Sam's hospital bed, watching him breath, slowly. He has all sorts of wires poking out of him, as well as a breathing tube. The doctor walked in, and Dean stood up.

"The MRI shows massive internal burns affecting many major organs," he said. I closed my eyes tight and hung my head. "Oxygen to the brain has been severely deprived. The coma is the body's response to doing what it can to protect itself."

"This wasn't supposed to happen," I whispered.

"If your brother continues down this path," the doctor continued. "The machines might keep him alive but-"

"He'll be dead," Dean said, and him saying those words made it all too real.

"Technically, yes. I'm very sorry."

"So, there's no recovery?" I asked, looking up. "No bounce back?"

"I'm afraid that's in God's hands, now."

"You're a doctor," Dean said. "A medical professional. You're trying to tell me that my brother's life is in God's hands? What is that supposed to be, a comfort?"

I put my hand on Dean's arm, and he sat back down.

"Mr. and Mrs. Dougherty-"

"No, God has nothing to do with this equation at all."

"I didn't mean-"

"That's not good enough," I whispered.

I stood up and left the room, searching for the chapel. I walked the corridors and finally found it. I wasn't one for praying, but I needed Cas. "Are you there, Cas? Sam's hurt, real bad. Doc says he's not gonna make it. I know you think I'm pissed at you, okay? But I don't give a damn that the angels fell. So whatever happened, I forgive you. What you did and didn't do. Please, Cas, we need you here."

"I thought you were an atheist, Lexus," Dean said, and I turned to face him as he sat down next to me.

"Kind of hard to be when one of your best friends is an angel," I said. "And a prophet of the lord lives with you, along with the Scribe of God existing." I looked around the chapel, only seeing a few people there. "Dean, I have an idea."

"Hmm?"

"You'll have to trust me on it, okay?"

He nodded.

I looked down, then closed my eyes. "This goes out to any angel out there with their ears on. This is Lexi Hammel, and me and Dean Winchester need you help. Linwood Memorial Hospital, Randolph, New York. The first one who can help me gets our help in return, and you know that isn't nothing.

"It's no secret we don't exactly see eye to eye, but you know we're good for our word. And I wouldn't be asking if I didn't need."

***

A woman walked in Sam's hospital room and leaned against the door frame. Dean stood up. "Okay, I'm just gonna say it, are you an angel?"

"Sometimes I wish I were," she said, laughing, and I sighed. How long does it take for an angel to get here? "I'm the grief counselor here at the hospital, my name's Kim."

"Right, yeah, sorry."

"Look, we're just really tired," I said. "All due respect, we're not grieving. Not yet."

"I'm afraid that in times like these it might be best to talk about the inevitable."

"Okay," Dean said, "I'm sure you mean well, but where I come from, 'inevitable' is a fighting word. There's always a way."

"And I'm a prayerful woman who believes in miracles as much as the next, but I also know how to read an EEG. So unless you have those angels you're looking for."

I sighed, looking down, then glanced at Dean. "No, we don't but I think we have something better."

"I've got the King of Hell in my trunk," he smiled and followed me out of the hospital, jogging toward the car. 

"Is that supposed to be a metaphor?" The lady called after us.

Dean tapped on the trunk of the car. "Crowley, listen here, you son of a bitch. One for yes, two for no. Are you still alive?"

There was no response. "Come on, don't be a pouter," I said. He hit back once. "There you go."

Suddenly someone grabbed me and pushed my back against the trunk, a knife to my throat. "You prayed."

I looked up at him. "Yeah, for help."

I turned to see another angel holding Dean. "Yes, you will be helping me. You know, you've become quite popular since you began riding with the Winchesters. You've climbed very fast up our most wanted list, so, if you lie to me, Alexis Hammel, I will rip your throat out. Where is Castiel?"

"Flattering, really. But, uh, who's asking?"

"Try every angel who was ejected from their home."

"Oh, well, in that case, I have no clue."

He slammed the back of my head against the trunk twice. I groaned, watching as he raised the angel blade that was pressed against my throat

"Easy, brother," an angel said, grabbing the hand with the angel blade in it. "This young woman prayed for our assistance, so tell me, are we creatures of wrath or compassion?"

The angel looked confused. "Forgive me, brother, but I do not recognize you."

"Happy to make your re-acquaintance, after you disarm."

The angel let me go, and I moved out of the way, scooting over to where Dean stood, free from the other angel. The angel that was holding me punched the angel who saved me.

"Come on, now. Is this any way to treat a brother injured in the fall?"

While they fight, me and Dean turned to the angel behind us, who was holding an angel blade. Me and Dean managed to fight him off, disarming him and using it against him. We turned, seeing the angel that saved me trapped between a car and the other angel. Dean quite literally stabbed him in the back, killing him.

"Who are you?" I asked, walking up to stand beside Dean.

"Never mind me," he said, panting. "You're Alexis Hammel-"

"Lexi," I corrected.

He nodded. "Lexi. And you're Dean Winchester. I heard your prayer, and I am here to help." He managed to stand up, leaning against the car for support. Then he passed out and slowly slid to the ground. Me and Dean looked at him for a second, confused.

"Okay," Dean said, throwing his hands up and sighing. "Come on, help me with him."