You know when you're listening to your favorite song and you just can't help but sing and dance around? Like the song just fills you with positive energy and you're bursting at the seams so you have to get it out somehow? That is the feeling I get every single time I talk to him. Like all the worries, doubt, and insecurities are pushed out and replaced by positive energy that makes me want to burst into song. I want to always have his voice in my ears.
Has there ever been a time when you've had the longest day? Nothing was going your way and it was stress piled on top of stress. But then you finally got home and there was a hot dinner waiting for you and you took a long, hot, relaxing shower and it felt like all your problems just melted away? That is the feeling that I get every single time I talk to him. Even if I can't see his face, it brings me joy. The thought of his radiant smile makes me want to fly to the moon and shout into the void of space ,"Where is the catch?" For nobody as perfect as him could love somebody as flawed as me. However, he has defied the laws of attraction and is in love with me, flaws and all. And sometimes I want to tightly latch myself onto him like an octopus in fear that he will be snatched from my hands and I will be left alone again. Barely breathing.
These feelings I have are as big as Jupiter. Sometimes they feel kind of like Jupiter too. Gaseous. Swirling around my insides with no definite form but matter nonetheless. And if you get lost in them, the pressure will crush you before you find your way out. Endlessly falling. Falling more and more every day. Never ending love. Never ending happiness. Never ending elation.
Euphoria comes in many different forms. Winning first place. Finally ending the torment. Finally getting everything you ever wished for. You are my euphoria, you make me feel all these things. I've won first place in the race of life solely for the fact that you are with me. You leave your traces on my person that are so clear to me. The way I think, the way I laugh, the way I speak. I've finally ended all the torment I felt before I met you. Spiraling into darkness doesn't exist for me when you exist. I'm finally alive. You are everything I've ever wished for wrapped up into a package that couldn't be any more perfect. The world wouldn't be able to handle it if you ascended, becoming more matchless.
Eros.
