Are You Hurting (Or Is It Just Me?)

Neon light flashed and waved throughout the marble walls. Intoxicated bodies keep swaying on the dance floor - each body swarmed with heat and covered in sweat. No one knew the body they danced upon, all they knew was they weren't going home alone tonight. They knew they would sleep and possibly wake up to a warm bed. But Jimin wasn't. His bed will be as cold as winter by the time morning comes. Unused side of the bed with covers with little to no ruffles.

Jimin was dancing, imagining the hands on him to be of someone else - hoping the sweet nothing being whispered in his ear was of his ex boyfriend. That he also couldn't just part with him and wanted to try again. Needed to work his own bargain of the broken relationship. But no matter how hard Jimin tried, the strange man wasn't Jungkook .

Jimin and Jungkook had split before winter break, both mutually agreeing they needed time.

Jungkook hoped he could find himself and try harder in his next relationship.

Jimin just wanted Jungkook back. He wanted to try again. However, he knew none was possible. He wouldn't get jungkook back, nor would they both try to fix their relationship again. He knew this, but he didn't want to chew down the reality of his situation.

Jimin needed time. Needed time to fix himself and grow stronger. His breakup with Jungkook was just another lesson of life he needed to learn and grow from. But just for tonight, he lost himself to the alcohol. Lost himself to tears and his aching heart. Maybe he brought someone home, maybe he didn't sleep in a cold bed tonight. He needed an escape from this harsh reality, needed to lose himself to the pleasure and pain so he could heal and grow stronger than before.

Sure, maybe this isn't a healthy way to heal, but with time he knows he'll feel better than now. Later in the future, he'll smile brighter and look back to his memories with Jungkook and just smile and laugh. He'll be sitting down on a swing outside his future home, listening to the screams and happy cheers from his children and smile. Maybe he'll shed a tear or two, but then he'll open his eyes and see the man he fell in love with. He'll see the man he married and the man who saw him grow and be the person he wanted to be.

"Jungkookie!"