Oblivion

Chapter Seven

The tension in the house increased substantially after I admitted to my hopeless, and failed, suicide attempt. Jacob stopped looking at me, focused on clearing his plate instead. Everyone's attention finally shifted away from me and the conversation steered toward catching up with family. I was grateful not to be in the spotlight anymore.

After dinner, Hannah and Aurinda began clearing the table and cleaning up. Isaac and Elijah headed into the living room, sitting in the two chairs facing the fireplace and smoking their pipes while they read in silence. Malcolm sat on the rug with a wicker basket full of wooden toys while Zak worked on something in a notebook, his pencil scratching furiously from time to time. Jacob sat me down on the couch beside him, he stretched out his long legs, crossing his ankles and settling in with a book.

I tried to read what was left of the cover and binding but the words had long ago worn away leaving me no clue what book it was without asking him. I didn't dare after the tension my last comment made. Instead I sat in silence watching the household around me go about their normal lives.

Once dinner was cleaned up and leftovers stored away, Hannah and Aurinda joined their husbands in the living room. Elijah pulled Hannah across his lap, tucking her in against him while he continued reading and she rubbed her hand over his chest. Aurinda took the rocking chair not far from Isaac and produced a length of knitting from a basket beside her that I hadn't noticed.

I felt out of place, with no purpose whatsoever. I curled up in my seat, a while cushion separated me from Jacob and he still wouldn't look at me. I rested my head on my arm, looking toward the curtain covered windows.

I wondered if my parents knew I was missing yet. Did they even care? Where they looking for me? How long had I been gone? For all I knew, I could have been there days, weeks, even months, with how little I could track time.

I didn't know I had fallen asleep until I felt someone nudging my shoulder repeatedly. I blinked the haze from my eyes and found Jacob's brown eyes looking back at me.

"Come on, it's time for bed. You have a whole day of a new routine tomorrow," he told me and held out his hand.

I was too tired to ask what he meant. I slipped my hand in his and let him lead me upstairs. The living room was empty, save for Elijah and Hannah, who were snuggled up in the chair still, speaking too quietly for me to understand a word they said.

"Five minutes and I expect you in your own room, Jacob," Elijah warned as we hit the landing that turned the stairs to the left.

"Yes, sir," Jacob replied with a now and continued leading me up the creaky, old staircase. At the top, he stopped and pointed down the balcony hallway, "Mom and Dad are at the end in the big room, Malcolm's next to them in the nursery still, but we're getting his bigger room ready which is down next to Zak."

I counted six doors in total. Jacob pointed out, "Zak is the second room in the left, I'm the third. For now, you're going in what will be Malcolm's room once he's a little bigger, or Mom has another baby. The bathroom is that door between my room and the nursery, that's the one you alone will use, for now. Zak and I share our own bathroom and Malcolm still uses Mom and Dad's, so no one should barge in on you in there when you use it."

He opened up the bathroom door and flicked on the light before digging through a cabinet. He came back with a set of floral print sheets and a pillow, holding them out to me between two calloused hands. I took the bundle of cloth and soft down pillow, following him to what would be my room.

It was bare compared to the rest of the house. No photographs anywhere, paint splattered plastic was hastily crumpled against the wall. A ladder leaned against the far wall with paint cans nearby. Thankfully, it didn't smell like fresh paint. Pink and white roses sat in vases on the bureau and side tables filling the air with a floral fragrance. The bed was a simple twin, pushed up against wall shared with the hallway. Tables with lamps sat on either side giving off warm, yellow light.