Hang In There, You're Never Alone

Why should I keep going on? (Please read this... Only if you want to though..)

Why should I continue to live? So many left. I was the one to snap. The one to fuck up.

I snapped on him. I loved him. I couldn't stop it. If I didn't relapse that night he'd still be mine. He'd still be next to me. If he was next to me right now I would kiss him and prove to him how much I love him. But I can't...
I lost the boy I loved.

If I just chose my words more carefully I could have made her stay. I'm sorry I fucked up.. If only I could have done better. I'm sorry I couldn't stop the cuts. If I was next to you I swear I would hug you and tell you how much you mean to me. Then try- no I wouldn't try I would make your day better. But I can't...
I miss her so. I couldn't choose the words correctly so she left.

I lost my friend because of a stupid fight. I wasn't thinking. Anger had overtook me. If only I could text her without her hating me. I would if I could. If I had you right next to me I would make things how they were, back to normal, the fun happy days. Not the dark stormy ones.
I lost my true friend that day.

If only she could have stayed I would have helped you. We could have been happy together. But again I couldn't say the right things. If you were right here I would hug you and never let go reassuring you that I wish you would have stayed.
I lost a girl that loved me that day.

I've lost so many I've loved. What's the point in staying? I have no one. No one likes me. Everyone hates me. I just want them all back, but it was all my fault I fucked up and I snapped! Nobody needs to come back actually cause I'd make their life worst. I just held them back in life. I'm so sorry. I love you guys.. But I don't even know if I'm gonna make it through the night.