Fallin' Flower

12

Dear Joshua,

Yes, finally you have a name. It's been quite a while since we got married right? How time flies, huh?! You still don't know about this book, do you? Well, it doesn't matter anyways. Its good that you don't know about this book.

You know Josh, you are nothing like I imagined. You are not the prince in shining armor I imagined you to be. You got in arranged marriage not because you were heartbroken, not because you were forced, not even because you wanted to.

Why then?

Because you were too busy in life so you left that to your parents. Now I did not expect that did I? You never say sorry after our fights. You don't feel jealous of other man. Do you care? You never write letters to me. You don't like the rain, let alone getting drenched in it. 'Cause you catch cold easily. You don't show jealousy like others. You find amusement parks extremely childish, and are especially scared of the scary rides that I enjoy. You know how much I was afraid of thinking we won't love each other at a point?

Well, you never said 'I love you' to begin with..

Irony right? Maybe that's why I could not like you in the first place.

But you wanna know something more interesting?

You are way better than my imagination. You showed how much you love your parents by trusting them to choose someone for your life. You never complained about their choice. (Though I must say you are lucky to have an awesome wife like me!)

You sure don't write letter, but manage to sent me a text or two to make sure I am ok and know what you are doing. And sometimes, just sometimes I found cute little post-it notes on our mirror or refrigerator, reminding me to take vitamins or drink water.

You don't like to get wet in rain, so you make some warm drinks and cuddle with me while singing with your sweet voice. You don't know how peaceful that is...even better then dancing and playing in the rain.

Summer is your favourite time of year. You love to visit some beautiful places during summertime. Especially the beach. You look like a kid happily playing with sands. Come to think that I am liking summer a bit more now, thanks to you!

You don't say sorry after our fights. You make me my favourite dish when you realise it's your fault. And I do the same when I know I am the one who is wrong. It feels nice to have our own way to apologise.

You don't get jealous of other men. do you care? Of course you do! You don't show them not because you don't care, but because you have trust in me and proud to have me just for yourself. You know that they can not have me anyway.

You don't like amusement parks. So most of our hangouts are either at home or in elderly homes. I love when those elderly people bless us for helping them. It feels like warm and heartfelt words.

Lastly my complain to you, it's that you never say I love you. I mean how can you make feel like this when you don't even say it!! How can you make me feel so loved without uttering those 3 words?! After all you made me realise that life is not a fairy tale, its not perfect in the way we imagine it to be. But that's what makes it more beautiful.

Maybe that's why I found my solace within you.

With you, I feel I grew so much! I grew to be patient. I grew to be expressive. I grew to be composed. I grew to love the summer I hated!

And I hate you for that! I hate how you make everything extraordinary out of the ordinary.

Maybe that's why Joshua Hong, I fell in love with you. One day, I just suddenly discovered that I fell for you, way before liking you, way before I thought I would fall for you.

Can you erase my only complain to you?

Can you actually say those words to me?

Happy 1st anniversary hubby...

From your wifey

P.s. This is the longest I have written to you, so make it count, ok?

Love ya!