I just don't understand

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~~TRIGGER WARNING~~
Domestic abuse

I don't know how to feel.
I'm scared, alone and not quite sure
that any of this is real.
My head claims it's the truth,
but my heart refuses to see
all the many different ways
that she abuses me.
She'll bite me, bruise me, tear my skin,
and say it's all for fun.
But even when I make it clear that I don't enjoy such things, 
she says "My love, I understand, but maybe just this ONE?"
Her "punishments" are cruel and vicious,
she'll smile the whole way through.
And no matter how much I beg and plead,
she'd still just laugh and coo.
I just don't understand her,
there  must be a reason  why.
Something, anything to explain
why she'd  want to make me cry.


(HEYO!!! So, there's the first three entries into this book of poems. Tell me what you think, what could change, what was kinda lame and henceforth lacking something.... As I said in the description, I'm a straight woman who's never been in any kind of serious relationship, nor am I a mother (But I AM the oldest child of 7 kids and it's just my dad and us right now..... So, kinda like the same thing ig..), but I will try to depict these kind of things for y'all, to the best of my ability. Don't forget to like, follow and comment your opinion!!! See ya next time my loves!)

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