Dependent, a Divergent Rewrite

Chapter 1

My name is Crimson Glynn, and I'm not a girl. Everyone assumes I am, and I understand why. I was born with two X chromosomes, and thus given a feminine name. While Mom doesn't require it, there's an unspoken expectation that I keep my red hair long so she can braid it in the mornings. Some days, it's the only time we see each other, so I understand her desire for one guaranteed moment.

My parents don't know that I'm a boy. I don't intend on telling them, not yet. Here in Erudite, we're expected to cast aside personal matters to work towards the community. We're not as bad as Abnegation about it, since we still allow ourselves indulgences in the moments of peace, but there's always work to be done, things to be improved. Something as "insignificant" as my gender issues would just distract them.

The only two people who know about my gender are my step-brother Ash and my therapist, Miss Dawson.

Ash was the obvious choice to tell. He's my brother, and we keep each other's secrets all the time. I know all the people he's kissed (he has a serious thing for Dauntless kids who could snap his neck), all the tests he's cheated on, all the times he's sneaked out in the middle of the night to jog because he can't sleep. He knows what few secrets I actually keep, so it's natural that he holds this one.

With Miss Dawson, it took me a while to open up to her. I was initially referred for anxiety, like many other teenagers (especially members of Erudite, for understandable reasons), but over time, it became obvious that I needed to tell her about what had really been weighing me down. She was understanding, and explained that I wasn't the only one going through gender dysphoria. She couldn't disclose who else due to privacy concerns, and she warned me that many people wouldn't understand.

If I choose to stay in Erudite, I'lleventually be able to fully transition. The technology isn't here yet, since after the wars that ruined most of the world, a lot of "non-essential" technology and medical advancements were lost. However, a team is getting close to synthesizing the necessary hormones. It would be risky, as test subjects would be few and far between, but it's hypothetically possible that I could be indistinguishable from someone born with XY chromosomes before I turn 30.

If, that is, I choose to stay in Erudite.

A choice I'll have to make tomorrow.

To say I've been mulling over it for a long time would be a complete understatement.

Candor was already out a long time ago. While I can appreciate the emotional honesty I see from everyone (and wish I could have for myself), the career choices are limiting. I could study law, and that's basically it. Accounting, I guess, but that's an option in Erudite as well.

Abnegation's out as well. I understand why selflessness is a desirable trait, but to the extent they're expected to uphold? No way in hell. They blend into the background, wearing nothing but grey and owning nothing. While I don't have much ambition, the idea of spending all my time working with the factionless and living a quiet life just bored me. Plus, given the recent reports of abuse... yeah, absolutely not.

Dauntless is the other end of that spectrum. They're wild and loud, and every moment seems to be a blast, but from everything I've heard, their training is brutal. Of course, no one's supposed to talk about a faction's Initiation ritual, but I've heard all kinds of things, from throwing knives at each other to literally facing your worst fears. People die there. Like, a lot. And young. I don't think I could keep up with that kind of life.