Deafening Silence

Dear Stranger,

I know it's kind of weird that I'm sending you this, because you probably don't care. And I'm sorry for wasting your time. But I feel like maybe you'll listen, because I know that I don't fully know you, and maybe that'll change your mind about listening and caring. And now I'm confusing myself. I hate when this happens.

Right now, I have a pounding headache and I'm just trying to clear my mind, but the thing is, it's actually more alive than ever. Which is also weird because it's 3:47 a.m. on a Tuesday night. I can't stop blinking and my vision is clouded and spotted. It's been like this since about 10:00, when I first put the bottle up to my lips tonight. My room keeps spinning and spinning. The bitter scent of alcohol is filling my nose as I take a huge sip. I drink and I drink, because I'm desperate to forget. I'm desperate to fill the cruel void, that emptiness that has been settled in my gut for an eternity.

Strangely enough, I'm smiling. It's a dazed, drunken smile, because I'm feeling numb again. I feel distant from reality, and that's okay. I can still feel one thing, though. I can feel Travis' presence, here, with me. I can feel his icy blue eyes piercing me, his sweet laugh ringing in my ears. I can feel my fingers running through his soft brown locks again, and I can smell his intoxicating scent. 

I can almost hear his sweet voice, "Hey, Ave."

I imagine myself plunging into his strong arms, "Don't ever let me go."

He let out a soft, sarcastic chuckle, "I wouldn't even think of it."

But slowly, I can feel him fading away from me; more and more every day. He's leaving me stranded. And now I'm alone once again with my spine against the wall. My heartbeat pounding in my ears. The hatrid running through my veins.

He's a liar. A big fucking liar. He told me he'd never leave me. He told me that he'd always be there. Now, he can't hear me. He can't see me. He can't hold me. He'll never be able to. And I hate him for it. I hate him for leaving me stranded here, while he is six feet deep, where I wish I was. 

This isn't fair. I shouldn't have to be put through this. It's all his fault. I hate him. But at the same time, I love him. I love his voice, his hair, his smile, his dimples, his eyes, just everything about him. 

But it hurts, because never again will I hear his soothing voice. Never again will he pierce me with his stunning eyes. Never again would he engulf me into a huge bear hug that was filled with care and protection. Never again would he laugh, or cry, or scream, or sing, or dance. Why? Exactly one year ago, Travis Rupert Price was killed in a car accident, leaving me to rot from my loneliness.

Love,

Avery 

Author's Note: Soo.. uh.. hi c: It's kinda boring and confusing and stuff but wahtever. balaah. keep readding!!

and YES, i did name my story after my username FIGHT ME.