HELENA
everything is wrong with me
blood flesh and mind
everything is not enough with me
talent words and love
everything is not good in me
feelings wishes and thoughts
i am rusted
as an ship anchored at the shore
uncapable to navigate
neither to get drown properly
i'm in between of nothing
and almost something
i'm always praying to god
but he has never dare to get inside my garden
are you uncomfortable with silence?
are you not used to similarity?
i'm not you
but we have the same taste in quiet destructions
me with myself
you with human kind
i dream of Eden
please bless mine.
i seek for beauty
i seek for fantasy
i found heat
the sun inside my pillow
light emerging from nightmares
burning inside
i'm thinking about dying
i'm an ignorant
truth is revealed against me
it is something that disguises
with poetry and dreamlike forms
maybe it hides destruction
in every little word
that creates
so i'm always tearing down
my identity
to build an idea of who i am
me;
naked, exposed
so devastated and so violent
beating myself with
hate
confusion
solitude
