this book is basically dedicated to my rants. all from personal experience. kindly exit this page if you think that this'll be a waste of your precious time :)
-alison
Crushes.
Hey. We've all had or have one right?
Sadly, this chapter isn't going to be solely about how your heart rate increases dramatically when they walk into the door or how you accidentally wet your jeans at the sight of them.
no.
this chapter is all about a few people I know personally.
Oh yes. We all know that you're very very very very beautiful. With your long eyelashes and beautiful eyes and dimples and luscious wavy hair and your good grades and your alluring perfectness that drives the boys crazy and the girls filled with hatred.
I am not cursing you for how blessed you are in various factors.
I am addressing the way you react to knowing that someone had a crush on you :)
First of all, don't make a HUUUUGGGEEEE deal about it. Be humble. Yeah, it's a huge shocker that so and so has a crush on you. But, play it cool right. Don't make such a big scene about it that within five minutes your entire grade knows about so and so's liking towards you.
Secondly, yeah I know you know that you're very beautiful etc etc. That you own the "qualities" of a goddess etc etc. But at least TRY not to ruin someone's self esteem just like that.
And to give you guys a visual image of this. Here's a little conversation between "Dramatic" and "Peter"
--
Peter: uh hi Dramatic. I..dont know how to put this but this has been bugging me for the longest time ever and this is the reason ive had trouble with stuff ihaveahugecrushonyouandidonthinkthatyoulikemebutilikeyouandmaybewecouldgooutforamoviesometime???
Dramatic: WHAT. OH MY GOSH. ME?!?! WITH -YOUUUU!!!! GOSH LOOK AT YOU. YOU TOTES OBVIOUSLY KNOW THAT IM WAYYYYYYY OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE. GET OUT OF MY SIGHT. SCRAM. NEVER. EVER. TALK TO ME AGAIN
-
I may or may not have written that to the extreme but you get the picture.
OH YEAH.
AND THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE.
So basically they have a crush on this guy right?
Of course, a little cyber stalking wouldn't hurt eh?
So they go on their social media site(s) and LIKE AND COMMENT ON ALLLLLL OF THEIR PICTURES.
example:
-pic of crush eating a burger-
Them: OHH MAI GAISH!!!! IN & OUT ITS MAI ALL TAIME FAVVVVV OMG BOJIO :)))))))))))
And if someone comments on their crushes' post:
-standing by the Grand Canyon -
Someone: HAHHAHAHAH DUDE HOPE YOU FALL
Crush: (@.Someone)oh well I didn't so guess your wish was a total waste
Them: OHHHH BURNNNNNNNNN
Them: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHWHAHAHAH YOU SO HURTTTT ISIT -crush's name-
Them: HAHAHHAHAHAH SO FANNNI SO FANI I KENOT TAIPEEE
Them: oops sorry autocorrect
Them: haha gotta hate autocorrect.
(Yeah, gotta hate "autocorrect")
Them: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Them: Oi reply to my text
Them: Oi I see you online on Facebook
((All under five minutes my friends 😌))
And yes. We all know you have this huge crush on him that you have sleepless nights because of him. But. Please. Don't. Mention. Him. Every. Five. Minutes.Whenever. I. Chat. With. You. We. Are. Sick. Of. It.
I mean, it's fine if you go on abt them from time to time because. Let's face it. We're humans. We strive for attention. But, isn't this a little too over this extreme. Won't you think that he'll be A LITTLE?? Maybe just A LITTLE BIT creeped out????????
Idk this my my opinion so yeah.
And dudes.
Mainly 10 year olds. Or those who are ten at heart.
This is addressed to a certain person.
Yeah I know you're naive and young and not to mention young but please dude. Calm down. The "time" will come. When the time comes. You will find the right person to date.
Like literally. You're basically ten and you're already writing down who to "go out" with next.
And if that girl is probably much matured than you you may leave her heart brokered and heaven knows it's not that easy to fix.
But seriously.
Guys.
And
Gals.
Please. Do things a little bit more maturely.
-
just a little reminder: this book isn't meant to offend anyone. this is just my point of view on these matters. and obviously, i'm no pro at these things but eh. this is a rant book for a reason.
-alison
