Skin Hunger

"Down here."

Casper made us stop in front of a furniture store.

"Here?" I asked. The comfortable armchairs in the window front looked way too innocent to have anything to do with an illegal rave party.

"It reminds me of old people," Jessica said and shuffled in her coat.

"That's the cover." Casper waved us down a narrow alley. "Come on."

Jessica, Alex and I exchanged glances.

"Unless you're too scared," Casper taunted.

"Well." I squared my shoulders and marched after him. "We're here, aren't we?"

We kept a safe distance to each other as Casper led us to a plain metal door at the back of the building. He knocked five times, two short raps and three longer ones. I watched his hands as he did so, and then the small hairs in the back of his neck. I imagined running my fingers through them, and a thrill tingled up my spine. Tonight might be the night.

The door opened, and a big, muscly guy wearing a mask awaited us. My body was immediately stiff. Nothing screamed illegal more than the actual hosts hiding their identities.

"Yo," Casper said and showed the bouncer something.

The bouncer stepped aside, and we entered. It was a small room with only a stool for the bouncer and another door. He opened it, and I heard the faint dunk dunk dunk of a base. My heart fell in with the beat, pumping ecstasy into my veins.

We went down a staircase to another door. Casper put his hand on the doorknob and grinned at me.

"Ready, princess?"

I grinned back. "Take me away, prince."

He opened the door to fairyland.

The club was dark and big and loud and terrifyingly wonderful. I held my breath and stepped in. The others followed. There were bodies everywhere. It was way too crowded to keep the proper distance, and Jessica's shoulder squeezed against mine. I looked at her. We were so close we could breathe each other's exhales.

She threw her arms around me and squealed. I laughed and hugged her back, hard. Alex wrapped his arms around us, and it was so surreal this bundle of limbs, skin and breath.

"When you're done, we can get drinks," Casper said in his usual, amused drawl.

"Screw the drinks," Alex said and grabbed Jessica. "Let's dance!"

They shot off to the dance floor and the colored lights. I glanced back at Casper.

He smirked and bowed. "Care for a dance?"

"You're so cheesy."

"Not my fault it works."

I rolled my eyes and waved at him, still not ready to take his hand or even touch his sleeve-covered arm.

We hustled through the crowd, bouncing this way and that. Every time an elbow or leg touched me, I felt an electric jolt. This was bad. Very bad. The kind of stuff that got people killed. The kind of stuff only selfish people who didn't care about other's sacrifices did.

I'd dreamt of it since I was twelve.

I turned and there was Casper. Close, but still not touching.

I opened my mouth to speak, to tell him I'd never even held hands with anyone but Jessica or Alex, and even with them only when we could get away with it without being reprimanded by the adults. The loud music swallowed my resolve. This was no time for words.