Boarded Windows

New Beginings

Annalee walked up the porch steps to the old house she and her father used to inhabit. It was two stories in a dirty gray with white shutters a wraparound porch that had an old porch swing. If it had been kept up better it would have been a very charming house. She was amazed to finally know what the outside of it looked like she never thought she would. Unfortunately it was much more attractive than the inside of the house. She sighed and unlocked the front door letting herself into the small entryway. The carpet inside was dingy and stained one would never guess it had originally been a bright white that was just as fluffy and welcoming as a wisp of cloud in the sky. Those days had long since passed and she scowled at the reality that lay before her. A cluttered stand was next to the doorway into the kitchen, white walls nearly as bad as the carpet and the stairway to the left that led to the upper level had a broken handrail it was putrid. She had never felt the house was in any bad shape until the day she had walked outside and again when she has discovered the flowers in the park. The beautiful outside world had opened her weary eyes to the life her father had truly made them live. A tear pricked her eye at the thought of it all how unfair everything had been but she felt his slap coming and when it never came she gratefully sat down, back to the door and sobbed.

Annalee had thought a million times; well way more than a million times of escaping the house and running away. Finding somewhere to be free, perhaps even loved like the women in the books she snuck from her mother’s belongings in the attic. So even through the past seventeen years she was able to know between right and wrong in society because of those wonderful pages filled with adventure and love and wonder that she had never believed possible for her. It kept her sane all the years she was held captive in the house by her father not allowed even so much a peek out the window. She had seen some t.v. by sneaking into the living room after her father had passed out drunk and left it on. Those were also magical moments allowing her the freedom she deeply craved while trapped inside.

All of Annalee’s deepest, darkest secrets resided in the house with her and she felt the weight of it pressing on her shoulders as she walked up the stairs and passed the closed door on her left. A rancid odor seeped out from under the door so she grabbed a towel from the linen closet and stuffed it against the crack. Somewhat satisfied she continued down the hall and entered her bedroom placing her newly found treasures on the dresser. The tiny room held a twin sized bed with a too small princess comforter and one crusty and worn pillow. Catching her eye she grabbed the pillow and shook the cover off. She would wash it and have a nice soft pillow case the thought made her happy but she didn’t dare smile not in this house. The glasses slipped out of her pocket when she bent to pick the pillow off the ground and replace it on the bed. Snatching them up Annalee hesitated she wasn’t sure if she wanted to see her childhood or the house with such clarity as the outside objects that had scared her not long before. She was learning to be strong she reminded herself scolding her fear and shoved the glasses onto her face at the same time squeezing her eyes closed tight. After a few moments of battling herself Annalee slowly opened her eyes and gasped in horror. Her room was disgusting paint chipping in the corners stains on the floor the beer bottle fragments still laid in the corner where they had landed the night she refused her father. It had been so long ago and yet instead of picking it up she learned where it was and side stepped it. Her nerves were on edge as she ventured out of her room to see more of the house. Bile rose in her throat the further she walked seeing holes in objects, urine stains on the carpet and walls. Dishes piled high in the sink, mold covering more than half the food in the fridge- food that she had been eating sparingly over the past three months. Dust bunnies gathered as armies in the corner and the bathroom had unknown substances smeared over every surface.

How had she not known what condition she was living in? She thought horrified. She put the newly found math book at the back of her mind and found a bucket that she filled with hot water and shampoo for soap. Starting in the bathroom she cleaned every square inch of the house she could reach, transforming it bit by bit. After scraping the last of the crumbs off the kitchen floor she sat back on her haunches and breathed deeply. The house may not be perfect quite yet but through her new eyes it was a million times better than before and it smelled of strawberry shampoo despite the familiar undertone of decay. She felt accomplished and satisfied with herself, something that was as uncommon to her as smiling. It felt…really good. It had also exhausted her and she yawned as if to make that point. So dumping the bucket of water in the sink (which was now a sick shade of black) she headed back upstairs to her room and crawled onto the small bed. She had previously washed all the bedding and replaced it and the clean scent was almost a transformation on its own. What had really changed the room was the empty corner where the glass had been, the stains scrubbed near to extinction from her carpet and her belongings carefully picked up and put away in newly designated areas. Knowing where everything now was in the house and that she had put her own touch to it through cleaning it made her feel comfortable. Taking off the glasses and setting them on the bedside table she had drug in from the guest bedroom she snuggled deeply into the comforters she found stored in the attic. It was heaven. It smelled clean and was so soft. She said a silent prayer before drifting into sleep.