You say, "See you later"
But now, your lips say goodbye
Your hugs used to feel like, "I'll keep you safe"
But now, you don't hold me as close and as tight anymore and it feels like you're tired of me
Your hand in mine used to mean, "I'm proud to show you off"
But now, you hold them limply in yours or don't at all
Your smiles used to feel like, "I was your world"
But now, your smiles have turned into grimaces and frowns
Your laughter used to mean, "You make me so happy"
But now, your laughter have turned into shouting and screaming in anger
Your reassurances used to feel like, "I'm here for you"
But now, your words cut me, you tell me to get over it, that I'm too much of a burden
Your random calls used to mean, "I want to hear your voice and see your face"
But now, they mean that you're too busy and I have no time for you
You used to say, "If we can get through this distance, we can get through anything"
But now?
Now you're calling it quits.
Now you're taking back everything you've said to me.
Now you're saying things to me that you said you would never.
Now you.
Now you have left.
You left me.
When you said you wouldn't.
When you said you'd be here.
That you'd love me even with the baggage, the anxiety, the attacks.
Reassurances meant shit to you back then.
You didn't mean it, because if you did, you'd be there for me when I needed you.
You'd still be here.
But you left.
You turned your back on me.
You. Left. Me.
And now?
I'm broken.
You're done.
I'm done with feeling anything but pain.
I need you but you don't need me.
You put me back together only to break and crush me into even tinier pieces than when you found me.
You helped me, only to break me down, slowly.
Why?
I love you.
Please.
Come back?
Please.
Or don't.
I'm sorry I made you unhappy while being with me.
I'm sorry I'm a shit person.
I'm sorry I made you stay even when you wanted to leave.
I'm sorry.
