This is Where you Want to Be (Barlyle)

Chapter Ten

"It's everything you ever want."
Phillip watched as Barnum's top hat was passed from performer to performer during the show.
    "It's everything you ever need."
Anne plucked it from the grasp of an elephant's trunk and flew around the ring on the trapeze, tossing it to Lettie.
    "And it's here right in front of you."
Phillip took the hat from Lettie's hand and ran towards Barnum.
    "This is where you want to be."
The ringmaster seemed to sing those last words right at Phillip as he passed him the hat. They made eye contact, and Barnum grinned and winked almost imperceptibly, making Phillip's face flood with heat.
The song carried on, each act perfect, just as it had been last night, but this time, P.T. and Phillip couldn't keep their eyes off each other. Phillip was in such a state of euphoria, so high from happiness, that he didn't care that Phineas took his hand when the song ended, gripping it tightly as the two bowed in front of the huge crowd.
But he did care, however, when Barnum took his face in his rough hands and kissed him. Kissed him in front of all the people watching, all the flashes of light from press cameras. Phillip pulled away, glaring up at the ringmaster.
"What was that?" He muttered, and ran out of the ring.

Phineas just wanted to apologise.
The show had ended, and there was no sign of Phillip. Barnum had made a rash mistake, a split second decision that could cost not only his career, but Phillip's as well. He had to find the younger man and explain.
He began to run. Running from the circus, shouting a quick apology over his shoulder to the troupe as he went. He ran to the bar, the place he knew he'd find Phillip.
Barnum burst through the doors, looking around for the younger man. He couldn't see him. He asked the barman.
"Excuse me, sir," he said. "Have you seen Mr. Phillip Carlyle? I thought I would find him here."
"Not since last night, sir, not since you ran off into the night with him."
P.T.'s brows knitted together, too preoccupied with his thoughts to pick up on the mocking tone of the barman.
"You need a drink?" The barman asked. Phineas nodded, taking the glass of whiskey that was set in front of him.
He trudged out of the pub, sitting down on the cold step of the door, thinking as he drank. If Phillip wasn't, here... then where was he? He must be at the circus still. Barnum sighed. It was worth a shot. He stood up, ready for the long walk to back to the circus, when he heard the telltale sirens of the fire department. Two horse drawn carriages carrying firemen and hoses raced by, men shouting and running after them.
"Fire! Fire in the circus!"
Phineas's blood ran cold. His drink tumbled to the floor, smashing the glass. He took off after the carriages, adrenaline pushing his muscles harder than ever before.
    By the time he'd reached the circus, the huge, once impressive building was burning, smoke billowing from the windows, red hot flames engulfing it. Barnum pushed his way to the front of the crowd.
    "Let me through! Please, this is my circus, I need to get through-"
    He found the troupe huddled together, some of them white with fear, others crying hysterically. He scanned his eyes to make sure everyone was safe. His heart skipped a beat. Where's Phillip?
    "Anne! Lettie!" He shouted. "Where's Phillip?"
    The two women shook their heads, fear etched on their usually bright faces.
    "Barnum you can't go in there!" Lettie cried.
    He shook his head, pulling his coat over his head and holding it to his face. "I have to."

    Phineas rushed into the burning building, instantly feeling himself heat up, the flames licking around his legs. The smoke stung his eyes and filled his lungs. He pressed the coat tighter against his face.
    "Phillip!" He shouted through the fabric. "Phillip!" It was no good; he wasn't loud enough. Barnum took a deep breath, trying to inhale as much of the filtered air he could before letting the coat fall from his face.
    "Phillip! Phillip, please, where are you?" He yelled as loud as he could.
    "Phin?" A familiar voice croaked.
    Barnum staggered towards it. "Yes, Phillip, Phillip it's me, I'm here!"
    He soon saw a shadowy figure in the clouds of smoke. Phillip was hobbling towards him, his eyes alight with fear. The younger man threw his arms around Phineas's neck.
    The two men embraced, not caring about the raging fire around them.
    "Phillip, I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking," Barnum whispered.
    Phillip's eyes widened, but not at Barnum's words. He pulled Phineas towards him, dragging them both backwards as a loud CRASH shook the building. The entire ceiling collapsed, a large piece of burning wood hurling to the ground where Phineas had stood just a second before.

    "Thank you," Phineas spluttered, before a fit of coughs shook him. His whole body shook violently as he tried to clear the smoke from his lungs. It was too late though. He had inhaled too much. He crashed to the floor, unconscious, and Phillip screamed. He fell to his knees, trying to shake Barnum awake.
    When Phillip regained his wit, he stood up, hooking his arms under Phineas's, dragging him as fast as he could away from the fire. It took a lot of energy, and the ringmaster was heavy, a deadweight.
No, Phillip squeezed his eyes shut, Not dead. He can't die. I won't fucking let him.
    The thought gave him a burst of strength, and he heaved Barnum clear of the wreckage. The troupe rushed towards him, some of them calling for doctors, some running to get help. Phillip's legs gave way beneath him, and he fell down next to Phineas. He gripped the ringmaster's unconscious body, tears leaking from his stinging eyes, hoping, praying, that it wasn't too late.
    Phillip grasped at P.T.'s hand as two men lifted him onto a stretcher.
    He looked up at them. "Don't you dare let him die," He whispered hoarsely as they carried him away.
    Two more men arrived, pulling Phillip up by the arms and leading him to a different ambulance.
    "No, please, you don't understand," he protested, trying to pull his arms away. But the men were too strong. "He's my friend, please... let me go with him, I'm... I'm fine..." but even as the words left his lips, Phillip fainted, his legs collapsing beneath him again, the world around him fading to black.