This wasn't the plan.
I don't even know how we ended up here. It is fucked beyond measure, and it's all my fault.
Remus sits at the foot of James' bed, comforting Snivellus, sorry, Severus. This must be a first. Both him and Peter cast death glares at me every five seconds. I can't even get to defending myself.
Though, to be honest, Remus' hand on his back does make me a little jealous of ol' Snivelly...
I mean, sure, it was me who mixed Amortentia in Lily and James' firewhiskies, but I was drunk. I still am.
Alright, I'll admit it. Fuck-up of the entire century. But you can't deny that Snivelly has been a dick to me for 7 years. And it's also not my fault that James had some Amortentia just lying around.
It was this unfathomable hatred for him and my drunken state that I did that rash thing, which was inexcusable even for a universal fuck-up like me.
But what's really worse, though, is the fact that some have been saying I did it on purpose.
Some as in everyone here at this party.
Sure, I was a prankster. But the old days of prankster Sirius are over! When the fuck will people realize this?
I don't know if Moony and Wormtail think so too, but I'm hoping they know me well enough to see through the hoaxes.
Yes, I won't deny it; I shipped Pads and his 'Lily Pad' throughout our school days, and even though I tried to separate Lily and Snape many times, I won't sink as low as this.
Remus stands up and begins, "Sirius, do you realize how serious this is?"
Peter frowns at him, "Was that a pun?"
Remus answers his question with a glare.
Snivellus, through a brand new stream of tears, says something illegible that no one pays attention to.
"I was drunk!", I protest.
"We all were!", Remus counters.
"Yeah, well, Prongs should've stopped drinking after 3 bottles, too..", Peter mumbles.
"Peter!", Remus cries.
"Pads, are you really defending yourself after what you did? You broke up an engagement, illegally. You expect people to not be mad at you? Good thing they didn't throw you into jail."
I look at Peter, surprise at his words evident on my face. The bastard. He sure as fuck can be mature when he needs to.
"Sirius, I really don't know what to do..", Remus sighs.
I realise he is calling me 'Sirius'.
Fuck.
"Since when do you call me Sirius?"
I regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth.
"Since when do you destroy relationships?", Remus yells back.
He regrets the words as soon as they leave his mouth, too.
It all goes very quiet, aside from Snivelly's little sniffs. The asshole. Ruining the mood just because he was all heartbroken and shit.
Remus looks down and sighs, then looks up at me,
"I-, I don't know what to say. I cannot forgive you. What you did was messed up. You're a grown-ass man now, and if you still think what you did was forgivable, then..."
He sighs and sits down on the bed, his back facing me.
Peter looks from him to me, then says, "Do you know what they're saying downstairs?"
I nod, not looking at him.
I hope they can't see my tears. I try to wipe them before they fall, but I cannot do so without being obvious.
I feel Peter's eyes still on me.
The door clicks open.
My head snaps up. Peter's eyes are widened, and Remus' posture is now stiff. Even Snivellus stops bawling to watch.
Alastor Moody and Barty Crouch Sr., who were in no way on the invitee list, are standing in the doorway.
We all stand up.
Alastor Moody trods up to me. I step back and wince. The bed hits my ankle, hard.
"Black, we are obligated to take you to Azkaban, for your illegal use of Amortentia.", he says, in that bored, monotonous way of his. The way he addresses life sentences in front of the criminals' new families, with little kids often still using their feeding bottles, without even considering the amount of damage he inflicts upon the 2 or more people he doesn't mean to hurt. My mind goes very blank. My mouth feels as though it is filled with sand.
"No, sir. He wasn't-"
"Quiet, Lupin."
"Hold up! You can't just take him away, Alastor!", this comes from somewhere behind the two men, in a voice similar to Euphemia Potter's.
"I'm afraid, dear Euphemia, that we must take him away. The law is not forgiving."
Crouch's tone is steely calm.
She steps out of the shadow, into my view. She still has her pink party hat on, but her hair is coming down from the elaborate hairdo in which she'd styled it only this evening.
Only this evening.
"You cannot take our son away! He's only 19!", she continues.
Fleamont Potter appears next to her, his face ashen, "You couldn't catch the death eaters that murdered half our families, but you will arrest this poor boy?"
Moody, for the first time, says, "And who is this poor boy, Fleamont? Snape, or Black? Only because he's in your family, he's innocent?"
His hands remain still, firmly grasping his staff. His eyes, nor his lips, move much. His words, however casually said, carry weight.
My tongue and throat go dry. My stomach feels weightless. The floor seems to sway, my legs slowly losing the will to keep standing.
Crouch looks at me, eyes exasperated.
"If you don't come with us now, we will be forced to use the dementors."
Euphemia's face twists in disgust. Fleamont, with an equally angry expression, holds her upper arm to restrain her.
"Yes, sir.", I mumble.
Remus inaudibly gasps. Peter looks at me the same way he did when I'd spelled Slughorn's hair green in our 5th year; like he could not believe I would do something so audacious but admired me for it. Fleamont watches me, his face slowly crumbling. Euphemia remains glaring at Moody and Crouch, as though she could prevent my imprisonment by staring them down.
I only have enough time to look at Remus over my shoulder before the room blurs into nothingness and the world spins, slowly dissolving with every step I am forced to take, everything unintelligible except the feverish beating of my own heart, which I've never wished would stop running before, amd the dreadful red 'You are going to Azkaban. You will be reunited with your father' scribbled over everything I see.
