Dear Shadows
A sad thing happened to me the other day, it made me so upset, I could barely keep the tears in until I reached the car. It was my last game of netball with my school because I have decided to quit because I always get put on the shit team where I am the only one in my year level. I am usually treated by shit by this one girl who is a year older than me. Lets call her E. E is constantly put into goal shooter because she can't run becaus she hurt her knee. Why would she even be playing netball when she can't run? I often play in the wing so wing defence, wing attack or centre. I hate playing centre. It makes me feel like shit afterwards. So the usual situation is, I get the ball in the centre third and will look immediately to E. She just stands there, looking at me. I'm in an awkward position, about to step and because no one is yet in position, I will either throw it to her and the opposition gets it or will end up stepping and losing the ball. I have asked her multiple times to come out of the ring to enable me to pass to her when I'm in this situation. However, she never does it and in turn, will yell at me for stepping or throwing the ball to the other team. This is one issue that made me sad as she started to yell at me on court for this reason alone. Also, as we knew that we would not be in finals wether we won or not, the team decided to mix up positions. In this game, I played C then GK then GK again because I am the back up defender. At the start of the last quarter, I asked the GA on the team, lets call her L, if I could play her position. She just said "No." I then asked again, pleading and she again said "No." She is 2 years younger than me. So, I just turned away and no one would fight for me because the coach was away coaching another team. That really pissed me off. I did not enjoy that quarter. And what pissed me off more was that it was my best quarter of the match. But everytime I intercepted the ball, the girls, one of them E, who was playing in WD were laughing there heads off and being all like "Look at us! We are so shit at these positions," so they wouldn't be there to catch the ball. I haven't talked to these girls since. And I'm a little pissed off at myself too because I have put up with them for the whole year and haven't said a thing. It took me to the last game to realise that they are just lazy ass stuck up bitches who only care about themselves.
But for now, follow me,
Love Amy
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The Letters to My Shadows
RandomA series of unedited pieces of writing by me to me. Kinda like a diary, but its all real and shit and its letters
