A Collection of Stars

Contemplating the Differences Between Looking and Seeing

There was a girl, on a warm summers evening,
dressed in amber and white.
Who ascended toward me, if only to say hello,
And so I paused from the tiring game of chase,
my friends and I so intently played.

She took one glimpse at me, for that was all she thought she needed,
And she thought she could tell my character from my clothing.
She compared herself to me, though I thought it meant close to nothing.
And she was arrogantly uplifted from my every fault,
though she was suppressed at each good characteristic I possessed.

She stared blankly at my face, focusing on every blemish,
instead of seeing the expression it possessed.
She looked me over, picking me apart piece by piece.
And she inspected the color and shape of my eyes,
Rather than surveying the joy and memories they held,
That, back then, echoed in my soul.

As she stood, I then surveyed her.
I looked at her hands and saw a talent in music,
I peered past the illusion she had tried so hard to hide behind,
And I looked into the recesses of her soul and was so surprised at what I saw...
I saw a girl who loved running along a beach water line,
A child who would get sick at baseball games from too much cotton candy,
A young woman who, on occasion, would sneak the last cookie past her parents.

I looked in her eyes, but all I saw behind them was a wall made of plaster,
Built by a dull, droning voice slick as oil.
It was like a neon sign that blinded everyone that walked past,
And it said, that you will only be loved and lead a happy life if you are the image of perfection.
And as you age the voice only gets stronger, as it strings its web of lies,
That will never waver or break until you collapse underneath their weight and let it take over.
Take over your heart, the choices you make, and eventually part of your sanity.

So pity the girls who thought they weren't as good as the others.
Who scrutinized their flaws and stored them away,
Awaking them evermore every time they looked in the mirror.
And they were the flaws that ate away at them all day.
Sadly, they would only feel satisfied when the imperfections were hidden away,
Because they felt they wouldn't be accepted with them out in the light.

I rarely would see this in people,
But as I aged, the numbers grew.
People who ignored the good things in themselves and others,
And only saw the flaws that barely existed.
Who compared each aspect of themselves to everyone they met,
And when they did this, it was envy that was becoming laced in their hearts like the poison it was.

And only a few seconds had passed since she first approached me,
That girl dressed in amber and white.
And so we exchanged our hellos and small talk,
Though thoughts of each other raced in our minds faster than racehorses.
And as we bid goodbye, I swore to remember that day,
As she scrutinized my appearance, and as I surveyed her disposition,
How I finally saw the difference between looking and seeing.