The Phobiasphere

Mia

"I think this will be convincing enough."

I toss my dirty laundry on the bed and put my bed sheet over it to make a decoy me. Why you ask? because my mother, Vanessa, is insane.

I take my backpack filled with clothes for the next day and of course...Booze. I tie my hair up into buns and slide in my shoes. I'm getting out of here, i am going to go out and forget the day just like any other day.

I open my bedroom door, poke my head out. I look left, I look right, coast is clear. I slowly get out of my bedroom and close my door behind me.

It's so dark.

Very slowly I make it down the stairs, step by step being careful , try not to make the steps creak, last thing I want is to get in trouble for this as well. I'm on the first floor, perfect, now i just have to walk to the door-

The light goes on.

"Holy Fuck!"

Fuck....its Vanessa.

"You almost made me shit my heart out are you fucking crazy?!" I laugh nervously, whatever trouble I'm in I'm sure this isn't making it any better.

"Where do you think you are going?"

"There is a test tomorrow, I'm going over to Jess' place to study." I hope she buys it...

"At 1:30 in the morning? You're going to study at 1:30 in the morning?"She crosses her arms, you can see the disappointment in her eyes.

"...Yes?" Fuck...that wasn't very confident.

"You used to be an honors student. Never gave me an attitude and did what you were told."

"Which is exactly why I'm going to study." Please don't see through my bullshit, I cant do this now..not today, She knows what fucking day is today.

I try to move past her to get to the door.

She blocks it again.

"Mia I am not stupid! You come home whenever you feel like it and smelling like you use drugs."

"What? I-" Stop this.

"Save it! Don't you think i notice these things?'

Shut up

"We came to America so you can make it to the top! This has been a mistake!"

Stop.

"You're failing school, missing days just to go and get stoned with your friends! You're wasting your life away!"

SHUT UP

"I am LIVING, I am living instead of stressing myself out to be who YOU want me to be! I am focusing on myself and being who I want to be!" Don't get me wrong, I understand her worries, I understand why shes upset, I understand HER.

"What is that? a drug addict? because your'e doing great so far-"

"A Photographer!" But she doesn't understand me. I did everything i could to make her happy always, to make Dad happy.

"A Photographer? that's not going to take you anywhere in life, that wont put any food on the table!'

"You are right." I know she is.

"I know what you want me to be, a Lawyer is that it? or how about a Doctor huh? Perfect! Your perfect daughter living a miserable life because SHE has to make mommy happy! The daughter that will one day successfully kill herself because she never payed attention to her self but she made mommy's dreams come true! Oh yes she did go and brag to your friends 10 years from down over my tomb and just say;