Hi, Wattpad!
Been a while
Im back in the buisness.
Today I confessed to my friend that I liked them, and damn, that was a ride
Their name is Mel
I called them cute in a main chat, and they private messaged me, asking for an explination
Where I went off, filling my laptop screen, describing why I loved them even though I know they like another girl.
The other girl is straight, so Mel's not dating them, but I know they wouldn't like me the same.
So Mellie and I are friends, half the active people on the server know, I feel dead, yeah.
And my gf knows I'm poly, but dosen't know I actually like another girl.
But since we're not dating, does that count?
I don't know, honestly.
Other than that, it's been a chill day.
Mom's been at work, siblings and I on different electronics ignoring one another, dad asleep, yep.
Normal.
A couple of minor hiccups, but I'm breathing and so is everyone else.
So I should be grateful.
(I am, really.)
Still, sometimes I wish there was a little more to me and my life, you know?
I dunno, just a little jazz - a little pop -
A little love - a little mystery
An adventure. I want an adventure.
That's actually what I think about a lot, is going on an adventure.
More than travelling the world, which I still want to do.
I wanna grow up and turn 18 and go on a spirit quest, you know?
Like the Native American tribes.
I wanna go into some vast wilderness - Canada, maybe? - and see how well I do.
I wanna live off of the land.
I wanna co-exist with the plants and animals and the stars and the earth.
That's a huge dream of mine.
I have a lot of big dreams, though.
Like when I grow up, I wanna move to Australia - if not there, England.
But who even knows if I'll ever get to?
As a lower-class kid in a family of 6 in America, I don't know if I ever will.
I dunno, maybe it's ok to dream, but I also have to look at reality.
Reality sucks, man. It really does.
I think I'll just stay like this for a while. Curled up in a blanket with books, shows, movies,
And my laptop, so I can talk to you.
Loves,
Gracelle
