His Attention| Sugawara Koushi x Reader

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You always consider yourself as someone who's quite or very insecure. It doesn't matter how much it is but one thing for sure; you'd feel it anywhere you go or even whatever you do.

But recently you felt when more of those, maybe because your best friend Koushi just called you his dear friend? But why, you should at least be happy, not triggered like a hopeless girl in love.

'Something's strange....'
You thought as you look at your fully readied reflection on the mirror. You didn't look anything particularly different from before but you still feel like you look weird. Perhaps it's just because it's become a fixed mindset since that's what you thought to yourself everyday.

You got ready and pick your belonging, making sure not to leave anything behind. Directing to the kitchen, you heard a strange chat for familiar voices.

'So what did thhe both of you did yesterday? Did you use protection?'
You heard your mom asked, a hint of grinning could be heard.

'Ahaha... I'm not sure what you're talking about but all we did is just accompany her and leave after she slept. That's all.'
Koushi replies uncomfortably as he chuckles awkwardly.

'Oh my, I didn't know you're the type leave right after you did it'
Your mom sounded her assumption, now having a smug grin on her face.

'W-we're not actually doing anything like what you thought of..'
Koushi objected, feeling quite uncomfortable and nervous.

'Heh? Realy... Boring.... You've been together for like ten years and you can't even kiss each other-'

"umm am I interrupting something?"
You asked, intentionally intruding the conversation to not let it get too far. They both then turn to look at you in surprise. Your mom had her eyes widen for a second but it turn back to the calm expression she usually makes. Maybe it's because she's scared of what you might hear.

"Hmmm... Nothing much. Do you want seconds Suga?"
Your mom replied as she then changes the topic.

"Oh it's okay.. And again thanks for the breakfast."
He responded, chirping as he greeted you.

"So... Since when are you eating breakfast here?"
You question him, raising your eyebrows.

"I came too early so your mom makes me eat breakfast while waiting for you."
He grins, answering your question as he rests his head on his palm. You then ate your breakfast quickly, realising he waited for you so long. You stopped halfway and turn to look at him as open your mouth to speak.

"Oh, really? You should've said so.... I'm sorry I took my time to the point you have to wait..."
You sulked, feeling guilty for having him to do things for you when you yourself didn't know what you've done for him all these years.

"Nah, its fine. If you really felt that guilty, then I'd suggest you eat faster."
He grinned.

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School walks like this are usually conversational and comfy but...
You didn't expect it to be this awkward and intense.

You stole a quick glance toward the setter as you looked back in front quickly. He was reading a literature book, and it wasn't as unexpected because he's one of the smartest students. You felt the urge to strike up a small talk but you're quite anxious as  you don't want to disturb him and it might not end well.

So you just you just thought of an idea, a mischievous one to be exact.

"Hey, don't just ignore me like that.. Are you mad or something??"
You pouted, elbowing the gray-haired young adult.

"Well, what do you think I'd be mad about?"
He quizzically asks, his eyes not leaving the compressed knowledge stated in the textbook page.

"W-wait, so you're actually mad?!"
You implied in disbelief, backing off as you shield yourself with your arms.

"Who knows.. It's for you to guess either way"
He mischievously smirk, glaring at your surprised form for a second to then only continue the next page of his textbook.

You grumbled in response, still actually searching the answer. But at the same time, you're also quite mad at yourself, you can't even predict his feelings after all the years you've known him and it's just....sad. Probably you can say that he's mad, despite the opposite body language he uses since, he's the type that can bottle up feelings.

So now..., who?

Who is he mad at? Obviously judging by the situation it could be you...

Well, moving on, why or how?

Just how could he be mad at you in some way. It's not like you did anything wrong, right? Despite having to depend on him the most in the past week-

"Hey... Could it be about... yesterday??"
You ask quietly and hesitantly, as you look away. Both of you stopped walking.

He then closes his book and uses his free hand to ruffle your hair as he chuckled.

"Well of course it is~ After about ten years we've known each other you've never told me that you're always left alone at home like that. Not to mention you're such a scaredy cat." He stated as his ruffle then became a frustrating torture on the top of your head.

"Ow- ouch! Stop it!! It hurts dammit..."
You cussed as you gently yank his arm, pouting. After the hair ruffle torture by him, your hair has become somewhat a bird nest. The third year the adjusted your strands of hair, trying to fix it so you don't look like you're having a bad hair day.

"Sorry, sometimes you just like keeping things to yourself and its not good, you know.. Not only to yourself, but people around you"
He advised, smiling like an angel.

"Hmmph fine, mom.. Let's walk faster, you don't want to be late for morning practice"
You pouted and grabbed his arm, urging him to walk faster.

Its not that you're keeping things to yourself. Its just that you feel its better to not bother other people and just face the fear yourself. Welp, you tried but still wanting to improve.

You wouldn't want to bother your friends since they'd usually spend time with their family.
And for Koushi, the case is more.... Special.

He's now focusing on volleyball for nationals so certainly his schedule is packed.. Especially that you don't want to distract him and such. You just wish that you could root for him and be there for him as much as he did in your life. You want to give him support for things he's passionate for; volleyball.

And you'd always hope that you can pay him back for what you owed to him...

Before its too late.