heartbreak-Kabir

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Kabir be lying if he didn't admit that a small part of him wanted to break Priyanka when he yelled at her. Instead all he accomplished was scaring little Kabir. She was right of course, when she joked that he favoured his namesake over the other twin but it was ok because he also got the love and undivided attention of his namesake. Or at least he normally did.

Right now, Priyanka was soothing little Kabir and little Rajan was looking up at me with expectation. The kid had expectations from a man he barely knew, he was so much like his namesake already. 

He begrudgingly grabbed a maroca and began to shake it over Rajan's cot and he was instantly entertained. He didn't understand why Priyanka acted like she had any understanding of who he was or what he wanted. She was just a girl playing Nancy Drew with her silly deductions and trying to put together the pieces of a puzzle. Once little Kabir stopped crying she put him down back in his cot but instead of switching back she resumed entertaining little Kabir. 

"I really didn't mean to make you feel burdened" she said so softly he could barely hear her over his  maroca "I just thought I might be able to help". 

And this is what annoyed him most about her, she was kind to a fault. She saw the good in everyone. There was no other explanation for why she thought he'd help her the night of the delivery when up til then he'd done everything he could to show her he wasn't someone she should rely on. And annoyingly she took it upon herself to clean up everyone else's messes. 

"You know just because you don't have anything else going on in your life, doesn't mean you have to insert yourself into others to find something to do" He basically spat it out but instead of looking at him like a hurt deer, which he honestly would have preferred, she looked like she was analyzing everything he'd said.

"Point taken" she said turning back to little Kabir. 

Her lack of reaction infuriated him. "Why you don't get mad at anything?" 

She laughed at him. "Trust me I've seen a lot scarier shit in my life. The broodings of a cocaine experimenting neurosurgeon don't even affect me".

He had her pushed up against the wall in a second, his hand clamping her mouth and she made no move to fight him.

"Don't you ever say that outloud again. Not here not anywhere!" he said removing his hand from her mouth but still keeping her pinned to the wall. The pretty yellow dress she'd worn today had ridden up and if it rose any higher her panties would be on display. 

"Oh right, that sort of thing is meant to be a secret right" she said tauntingly. He finally saw the wildness of the past return to her eyes that had been so serene that past week. Something he hadn't realised he'd actively noticed.

"I didn't put it together until earlier today, I thought you were just a little hungover from last night but that's not all is it? You like to experiment with some of the harder stuff too" she hissed venomously into his face and his body pressed further into her in retaliation, he was sure her underwear was exposed for all to see. 

He yanked her ponytail with one hand used the other to force her chin up causing her to tilt her head in an exposed and probably uncomfortable position. "You'll want to be careful throwing accusations like that around. Now you know I have access to do what I threatened to do to your Daada earlier". 

Her eyes glazed with fury but before she could do anything the door swung up and a nurse screamed with surprise. 

" what on earth do you think you are doing here?" and when she recognized she let out an incredulous tut "Dr.Kabir?" 

Priyanka pushed him off of her and straightened her dress before running out of the room. Great this is just what he needed, the nurses gossiping about something that definitely hadn't happened in here and it making its way to Amrita and much later Pree. He didn't have time to worry about that now, a loose canon had escaped and he had to contain her as quickly as possible.  

He stormed out of the room leaving a very shocked nurse behind him and rushed to follow Priyanka and found her waiting by the elevators with her back to him. The elevator across opened and he ran and grabbing her by the arm and dragging her into the elevator in one swift motion. The doors closed behind him and he pressed the button to his office floor. There was no one else in the elevator so he turned to speak to her freely. "We are going to my office, when we get there you can ask me whatever you want and I will answer all your questions, if you agree not to tell anyone". 

She stared at me in silence her gaze calculating and so when the elevator doors reopened on his floor, he grabbed her by the arm again and held tight until they were in my office and the doors were closed. He sat her on the sofa and leaned against his desk and motioned for her to begin.

"Are you intoxicated while you perform surgeries?"

"No"

"Are you telling the truth?"

"yes"

"How can I know that"

"You know it" he said decisively and knew it was true. She maybe just another amateur Nancy Drew but her instincts were strong and he knew she could tell when he was lying.

"How often do you do it?"

"Barely ever, I only tried it recently because I thought it could help me"

"I didn't see any needles around your place"

"you've only been there twice" he said knowing that he wasn't helping his case. She nodded in agreement  and continued to think.

"What made you want to use yesterday"

He let out an exasperated sigh, not wanting to get into it with her. Her hamster wheel would start putting too many connections together.

"I saw Amrita in the cafeteria yesterday and it set me off"

"Amrita? That's Dr.Shergill isn't! So it's about your ex!" like it suddenly all made sense. "she didn't contact you is that what made you do it?"

"No, that's not it. I mean, she didn't contact me but I wasn't expecting her to" he said and she continued to silently assess him. Unable to wait for her next question he continued "She looked at us like she was studying us and I know she got the wrong idea about us and would tell Pree and whoever else would listen to her. It sent me down this spiral of thoughts and I just needed to feel alive for a moment instead of feeling so empty". 

She opened her mouth to say something but closed it. After a moment she regained her agenda. 

"When was the last time you used before yesterday?"

"The day after you first barged in on me" he said truthfully and offered more information. "It was mine and Pree's anniversary and I needed more than just sex and booze to numb the pain". 

She raised her eyebrows and asked like the answer to her question would be obvious. 

"Were you using before your break-up or did you start after?"

"I started after the breakup"

"what happened between the two of you" she finally asked. 

"that's a long story" 

"clearly, we have the time" she said as she leaned back into the sofa, getting comfortable to prove her point.

He looked away from her annoyed and began to talk, and to tell her the story of Pree and I. 

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