MY LITTLE PRINCESS

I HATE YOU (Part 2)

Allan faced his father who is now with an indescribable expression sitting there on the backseat. Remembering the past made his heart ache more and more.

"It looked like it's only me who remembered it. Am I such a disappointment to you since I am not such genius like Albert?" Sadness filled his heart but Allan didn't showed it on his face. What he wish that moment was for Xander to remember what he did that made Allan miserable but nothing of sort was shown on his father's reaction that says he remember those moments.

"What are you talking about? I didn't neglect any of you. Is that how you both saw me?"

Xander's awkwardness to kids those times were so great accompanied by the pain of losing his beloved wife. And without understanding each one, they all drifted apart. The man who lost his wife was left with two kids and without knowing what to do or how to do things to raise them up, he became lost, and later his sons, too.

Hearing his son opening up, Xander realized that what he didn't want to happen just occured to their family. He wanted to have a loving family and to raise their children in a way that he didn't experienced when he was a child. But all was for naught. He drowned himself to work thinking that riches will give them happiness he cannot give since their mother was not there for them. Giving them the greatest education he can provide for the missing stories and interaction needed for a family. Not obligating them for anything just to give them freedom they wanted to learn things for their own. He never let the two of them clash inside and outside of the mansion thinking that they should get along more well rather than fighting.

That's when Xander realized he missed one thing in upbringing them: communication. He didn't communicate to the twin more warmly or even interact with them in a parental way. He became a teacher and not a father figure to them. His words were awkward and less enough to be misundertood and be taken as rules, instructions, commandments, and cold-hearted scolding.

Watching his father with a shocked expression, Allan searched for any trace of animosity - but there are none. What greatly shocked Allan was when his stoic father silently let his tears fall from his eyes.

"F-father? Sir?" Allan said in a perplexed look.

Xander wiped his tears as he heard that word. Sir. Father sir. Words not befitting for a father. Those were what his sons call him almost all the time. Words of deep respect not for a father but for a dictator mentor.

"I'm sorry. I want to rest for now. Can we go home for now?" With almost dry throat, Xander's voice didn't come out that powerful and intimidating like the usual.

Even though feeling a bit baffled by what his father suddenly showed him, he still started the car and slowly drive away and back to the route towards their mansion. More than his father's tears, what bewildered Allan the most was the word 'home'. A familiar yet unknown entity for the Oldenburg Family. With how they are now, the forgotten deal was put on hold. That proposal was supposed to be about the inheritance of the company and whatnots. Allan was even prepared to blackmail his own father and to use dirty methods but ...

"What .... what happened to you?" Allan asked as he cannot take the silence any longer.

"I ..." Xander sighed deeply and with his head bowed, he spoke words he didn't imagine he could.

"I love the both of you greatly. I know I am not the best father you can ask for but it is also not my intension to make you feel--"

"Stop!" Allan shouted as he harshly stepped on the break to stop whatever his father was about to say. After shutting him up, Allan stepped on the accelerator before letting his anger control him more which is caused by his father.