One Shot Stories

I Hate Myself

"Bea? What's wrong? Are you okay? Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?" Jaspher ask me worriedly,I just reply a smile bitterly while crying.

She hug me. Jaspher is one of my bestfriend yhat i love the most, she always here beside me whenever I need someone to cry on.

A minute after I try to speak but.....but I can't..... I can't

I try harder.

"Jaspher...... I-Im not o-okay" I cried silently but I can't.

"What happened?"

"I-I don't k-know.... I-I feel d-down..... s-so down"

"Mind telling me? im here to listen...." she said.

I keep on crying..... and a minute after I start to speak again.

"I-i hate t-them...... I-i hate them so much, I hate them f-for treating me like a trash, l-like nobody a-and like a wind. I hate them for giving me so many problems. I hate them for a-accusing me kahit hindu naman ako yung may gawa. I-i fcking hate them so much that i want to end up my life co'z of pain they give to me"

She keep silence that's why i continue.

"I-i dont want them in m-my life"

A smile form into my lips, a fake smile

"But the destiny is very playful, destiny give me such a problem taht I dont know a solution"

"Jaspher plsss..... Help me what is the solution, shoukd I poison my self? Should I cut my pulse? Should I get suicide?....... should I die?" I said keep on crying.

I was shock when Jaspher's hand land to my cheecks, did she was slap me?

"Bea! Dont do that stupid things! Suicide is not a solution! Bea listened to me! All our problems have a solution! You can find solution on that fcking problem! You can!
Just believe your self!" She scold me. How I love the way she scold me.

"How I wish I-i can do that Jas its very hard you dont understand me co'z your not in my position, its very hard!......." I chuckled.

"Its very hard my parent left me hanging so I decided to take the hardest part of my life cause I need to...... I need to fight alone withoyt any allies around just me, only me. I try to knock to their doors but there's no one who opened it for me." My tears start to fall again and again and again."Im tired." I whispered.

"It's very hard, all the time i need to bring a parent at school I dont know what to do cause I dont have parents, but nobody know's it co'z they all know i have." Sarcastic smile form into my lips.

"And when I have sick who's always taking care of me? No one, no one take care of me cause all they know I can stand by my own The fck of that!"

"Its very hard to the point that I just want to end up my life."

"Nobody know's my pain. Nobody knows my tears. Nobody knows how its hurt for me. And the fck! They did'nt ever notice my good work, they all notice my mistake my failure. Not my pain the hell of that!"

"I hate people around me to the way how they treat me, the way they notice me, and the way they hurt me, It causes too much pain, it causes damage! But they did'nt know cause all they know Im strong enough to endure it, Im strong enough to take it, to keep it! They all know that I can manage it. Damn it!"

"And now I hate my self so much...... I hate my self so much co'z I love the people that hurting me di ko sila kayang bitawan basta basta, I love them kahit na ganon ang trato nila skain that's why i hate my self so much co'z I love them so much!"

The end!! Hope you like it!

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