Sanctum Sanctorum(A Supernatural Fanfiction)

Chapter Two: Crawling Out of the Rabbit Hole

…four years earlier

Windham’s Asylum for the Mentally Unstable

“Tell me about the last thing you remember, Rachel.” Doctor Steele sat on the cushioned chair in the middle of his office, literally dwarfed by the sheer size of the room. Light from the window shone one his face so the only one in the shadows was Rachel and her thoughts.

Rachel remained silent for several moments and opted instead to drag her eyes around the room. It had the selfsame unsettling air of familiarity of most shrinks’ offices, trying to cater comfortability, but altogether failing, and instead exuded an unknown kind of hooded hostility. She cringed at the light wallpaper and the gigantic oak desk with its inexistent piles of papers, and the seven-foot bookcase with its hundreds of books that probably haven’t been read since they were stuck in the shelves.

“Why do you want to know?” Rachel asked when she decided she’d stalled long enough. It was, after all, the third time someone had asked her about ‘the last thing she remembered’. The first time, she’d been deemed out of it, but was excused by way of her year-long comatose. The second time she mentioned the particular memory, she was dumped in an asylum. The history didn’t have her particularly excited to share again. There were after all, worse things than being locked in a room at night, taking pills, and talking to a jackass in a suit.

Doctor Steele sighed and leaned forward, as if she had a secret to tell, but not altogether dominating. His voice had also dropped in volume when he spoke again.  “I’m curious, Rachel. And as I told you the first three sessions, it helps to talk.”

The couch she laid herself in was suddenly very uncomfortable, and Rachel fidgeted slightly, but she preferred to not look at the doctor. He had these piercing blue eyes that reminded her too much of Castiel, and they made her want to believe whatever it was he said. They were dangerous eyes, no matter how much she wanted to stare into them and make herself believe it was Castiel messing with her head,

And so she focused on the tiny, tiny flowers on the beige wallpaper. “The last thing I remember…” She trailed off. Lie, Rachel, she told herself. Lie and tell him something normal. She was so used to lying that she almost did.

“My father and uncle –Dean and Sam, and their friend Castiel were taken by this evil woman –an avenging angel,” she answered instead, regretting the truth almost as soon as the words flew out of her mouth. But she continued, censoring her thoughts as much as possible, “Lily, the angel wanted something from me. And she was going to kill them, unless I surrendered myself. I had to –Dean and Sam, they were all I had. All I have. I knew she needed me, so I played along.

“I was saying goodbye to them. It hurt. I had only just gotten my family back.” Tears streamed from behind her closed eyes, remembering the selfsame tears that fell from Dean’s hazel eyes and Sam’s chocolate ones. “And then Castiel started saying something weird.”

Rachel grimaced as Castiel’s blue eyes flashed in her mind, full of apology and grief –emotions unbecoming of an angel of the Lord.

The doctor remained silent, waiting for her to go on.

“He was saying sorry. Over and over again. I wanted to say it wasn’t his fault –any of it. But then, everything disappeared.” Her eyes opened again, her teeth gritted, half in anguish and half in longing. “And I woke up in the hospital.”

She didn’t say they had asked her to remain strong –to trust in them. It seemed too much of a reason to hold on to what Doctor Steele deemed to be a factor of her instability.

It was several minutes before Doctor Steele spoke again. “I’m sorry, Rachel. I’m sorry you lost them.”

At that moment, she felt as if he understood, even if it was apparent he didn’t believe it. “Yeah. I’m sorry, too.”

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A/N: Heavy-ish chapter here. Is anyone reading this, by the way? Give love on Christmas Day. Votes and Comments are appreciated.