Fifty Shades of Pink-Eye

Bella - I mean - Emily Swan

 

“She’s just so perfect”, Jacob Collington said with awe. “She’s greater than Lady Gaga.”

 He was talking about the infamous Emily Swan of course. I can’t blame him though. There’s just something about her – maybe it’s that beautiful shade of green in her eyes that on occasion suffer from pink-eye. It’s so alluring; the pink has a special effect so that, when she looks into my eyes, the pink just drinks me in, and before I know it, I’m drowning in a sea of green and pink.

“I know”, I sighed.

I would give anything to be like Emily – I would even give up my Harry Potter collectible wand. I’ve realised this feeling is mutual with all the Swansonians, that is, the greatest fandom to have ever existed – all for Emily Swan. Everything I did was for her, but she doesn’t notice. She never notices. Maybe that’s because her pink-eye tends to cloud her vision – but I can’t be sure.

I refocused my attention to my maths classwork, and gritted my teeth as Collington’s incessant whining stole my attention. He was going on about how smart he was, and how superior his intelligence was compared to the rest of the world. You’d think I’d be used to his complaints by now – but nope! It still ticks me off. The only reason I hang out with Jacob is because he shares the same food-tech class as my Emily.

“Oh I knew it was a plus b minus x squared. I just got confused for a second. This is a stupid exercise anyway. If I didn’t get it right, then how the hell is anyone in this class going to get it right?”, Jacob pondered out loud. Oh boy, did I want to hit him in that moment.

“Shut up, Collington – before I make you.” I warned. “And if you throw your pen down on your book one more time, I swear I will burn all of your Lady Gaga CDs! No one cares if you’ve finished the questions, so stop being a fag.”

Yeah, that shut the princess up. BRIIIIING! The bell rang. I’ve been anticipating the sound of the bell, because it marks the time that I will get to be in the same class as Em. I sprinted towards my next class, eager to see her.

I came to a halt in front of my biology room. I took a deep breath, composing myself. Just relax, be cool, I told myself. I swaggered to my counter, and waited for Em to arrive. You see, we’re lab partners. It’s totally great spending time with her. She’s just so smart, and perfect, it makes me proud to be a Swansonian.

I heard footsteps approach, and as I looked up, she was there. I exhaled.

“Hey”, she said, “What’re you up to?”

“Hey”, I replied, but my voice had shot up a couple octaves, and broke. Holy crap, I just embarrassed myself in front of Emily.

She didn’t mind though. She was so nice, with her usual pink-eyed glory. I heard Miss Satansen’s clearing of her throat, and focused my attention to the front of the classroom. Miss Satansen’s name was so fitting, I thought, it epitomises her likeness to the devil so very well.

“Today we will be studying the stages of mitosis with onion DNA”, Satansen instructed. “Pair up with your lab partners now.”

I glanced at Em, and nodded. We had a system. I get the equipment from the front of the room, and she, from the back. Collecting the microscope and slides, I made my way back to our desk and sat down.

I slid the first plate in. I inspected the plate briefly and identified the stage of mitosis. “Anaphase”, I determined, as I looked up at Em.

“Mind if I check?” She asked. She reinspected the plate, “Anaphase.”

“Like I said”, I teased with a crooked smile.

Emily replied with a smile. She slid in the next plate and quickly inspected it through the microscope. “Metaphase”, she decided.

“Mind if I check?” I asked. I didn’t wait for a reply, but instead slid the microscope towards me and looked through it. “Metaphase”, I agreed.

“Like I said”, Emily teased. She looked at me as she spoke, and her eyes looked different.

“Hey, do you wear contacts?” I asked out of my curiosity.

“Nah, I don’t. Either it’s the fluorescents, or my eyes have become more infected because of my pink-eye.” She replied.

Oh, that would explain the difference in colour. I then realised, that this scene felt familiar – like it was out of a book or movie. Twishite. That was it – this scene felt like one from Twishite.