(this has nothing to do with the previous chapter. I was roleplaying with Boba Nyoom whom plays as Sly. This whole chapter is a comedy)
"Do you have some porn magazines I can borrow? Come on, help a bro out" Reita already has enough magazines as it is. What's the point in having anymore? He's just casually putting an arm around Sly's shoulder, acting as if they're friends. "Please?" He begs. "You know what I don't even need them anymore. I could get laid easily unlike you anyway so here you go." Sly casually hands over every single one of his dirty magazines.
Reita felt the temperature drop a few degrees. He also felt like he had been slapped on the face but he was used to this treatment. Just not by a guy. "...Thanks bro..." He took the magazines. Well, this encounter was a success in a way thanks to the magazines. But then Kaidou pops in. "You're seriously giving him all?" 'You're way too late. Just give up' Saiki thinks, the quiet boy tagging along.
"Yeah I don't need them. Actually I do have another stash." Sly says. Unfortunately for the purple haired guy though, about half of those were gay porn magazines. "You do?!" Kaidou asks with sparkly eyes, seeming to be the happiest boy in the world. He then went back to 8th grade sydrome mode. "If that's the case... You should lend them to me. It'll help the jet black wing fight the remaining evil in this world." He says as his bangs covered one of his eyes. 'No, a porn magazine could possibly be the most useless thing out there. Besides, if there were any evil then I would know' Saiki thinks.
Sly grabbed a box that was full of them, giving it to him. "Yeah... you'll bust a big fat nut together to beat those bad guys." That sounded better in his head. 'I can't wait to see some hot chicks' Reita thought, making a pervy expression. The purple haired spirit pervert opened a magazine that was given to him. As soon as he saw the contents, the boy turned completely pale and got knocked out, his soul starting to leave his body through his mouth. "O-oi! These magazines might even be stronger than my Ultimate Knight Storm!" Kaidou shouts.
Sly didn't realize how much impact the magazine had done on the poor guy. Hell, even hearing Kaidous' words made him laugh in his mind. "Why do I attract the weird ones?" He murmured underneath his breath. Hoping no one heard. "I can relate." Saiki tells Sly, hearing his thoughts. It was then the dumb friend, Nendou saw Reita on the ground and grabbed the boy, making a commotion. "Don't die! If you die, I'll kill you!" Nendou says, shaking him. "I guess it's time for CPR!" He kisses Reita. 'If you die... Then it would make one less problem for me to deal with.' Saiki thought. "Nendou, quit fooling around! Things don't work like it does in a fairy tale book!" Kaidou says. 'Ironic coming from the one with 8th grade sydrome' Saiki thinks.
"Oi.." Sly glanced towards the pink haired psychic. "Let's ditch them while they're distracted and hang out somewhere quiet." Sly suggests. "Sure." Saiki nods in agreement, starting to leave. "Wait!" Kaidou says. "We missed our chance." Saiki said, stopping in his tracks. "I'll be dead if my mom finds this. Saiki, can you hold onto this for me?" Kaidou asks. "Hell no. And if you ask me to touch such an unholy thing again, I'll give you a slap" Saiki says. "Then... Sly." Kaidou says turning to him. "Will you hold this for me? You might save a life by doing so. And such a weapon must stay a secret from the dark reunion." Kaidou pleads. "I'm pretty sure magazines only have a drastic effect on Reita." Saiki comments
'Fuck..' Sly cursed in his mind, gritting his teeth when they were caught. Sly raises an eyebrow, confused at the favor Kaidou asked of him. "Can't you just hide them? You know what fine." 'What a fucking weirdo. I can just destroy him already. Even that perverted guy—' Sly thought before Saiki started to speak. "He's not good at hiding things." Saiki says as he remembered when he teleported into Kaidou's room to give him his stomach pills during a school trip. He saw his mom look under his bed to find Kaidou's diary. It wasn't his problem so he just left that day to continue to enjoy the school trip.
"Oh. Of course under the bed is the most obvious spot. He didn't think no one was gonna find out?" Sly asks. "His hiding spots are as bad as his drawing skills, sense of direction, athletic-" Saiki was cut off. "ALRIGHT, I GET IT ALREADY, NO NEED TO MAKE A LIST" Kaidou shouts. "So in other words he sucks in general. Pfft~" Sly says before laughing.
"N-no, I don't. I'm great at other things" Kaidou says meekly, poking his fingers together. "Like what." Saiki says. "G-God had to nerf me because he knew I'd be too powerful. I-I mean I am the great Jet Black Wing after all..." he murmurs. "Eh. At least you're not that guy." Sly gestured over towards Reita whom was still knocked out.
Saiki looks at Reita. "He's too far gone from this world." "Yeah. Um, now I'm worried about him. He hasn't woken up yet." Sly says. Saiki softly moved Reita's cheek with his shoe. Reita was making a creepy face, his nose bleeding. "Don't worry ladies. There's enough of me for everyone" Reita says. "Leave him. His dreams may as well be the only place he actually gets what he wants." Saiki says, removing his foot and was about to proceed to ignore him.But then Reita looked horrified. "Wait. You're not a girl- AHHH" He sits up, putting a hand on his chest as he catches his breath. "A nightmare"
Sly found this hilarious, even hearing Saikis' comment. Is he really that pathetic? Sly shook his head, disappointed. He smirked once squatting in front of Reita. "I can dress like one and you'll never know the difference~" Reita seems seriously turned off at that comment. "Stay away from me" he holds out his necklace of beads, as if that would repel him. "If those beads were actually holy then trust me, you would be long gone by now." Saiki comments
"Heheh." Sly laughs, giving a teasing grin before standing himself back up. Sly knows that Reita isn't gay anyway. "Would it be better if I help you get a girl?" he offers. Reita gets up. "Really? If you find me a girl with a big rack, then that would be amazing." His fingers wiggles as he made a gropy gropy motion. "Just do the world a favor and die already." Saiki says. "A girl, huh? Fufufu... I'm too busy fighting the forces of evil that I don't have time for such leisure" Kaidou says, trying to sound cool. "Then how the hell did you find the time to be here" Saiki comments.
"Yeah.. sure? We can do a double date if you want. Hell, I can hook us up with a couple of girls I've known. That or just randoms." Sly tells Reita. "So we're picking up chicks? I would like to join." Nendou said. "You're still here? You might as well give up on the idea of ever getting a girl because you have a lower chance to get one than Reita." Saiki told his deliquent looking friend before turning his attention to Sly. "Maybe it's better if it's some randoms. Don't want Reita to ruin your friendship with anyone" Saiki advised. "Uhh..." Sly didn't have anything to say to Nendou anyway, and he was thankful Saiki said something. "Thanks. Yeah.. you have a point anyway." And there goes another day wasted for Saiki Kusuo.
