[Listen To Me]

[CoRnAvIrUs]

rona is literally such a dumb bitch I cant even express how much I dislike he and how much she is ruining my life but yolo.

i also miss my friends but i see most of them a few times a month now that its starting to clear up and my state is opening things back up slowly. but the last three months have been the total worst. i also realized i haven't updated this rant 'book' in almost two years so that's the motivation behind this.

i seriously am scared that my marching band season is going to get cancelled this year which is really making me sad because this is my junior year so if they cancel this season ill only have one year left which sucks. but what sucks the most about that is that i got section leader for front ensemble which is absolutely insane because this is my first year playing for pit, last year i was in woodwinds, so yeah that's pretty mind boggling. which means ill be extra pissed if this is ruined. i also feel bad for the seniors who will have to miss out on their last year, and the drum major who is a senior so she wont be able to just do it again next year.

also my first prom is this year so ill be upset if that gets cancelled.

its not just things that could get cancelled that's making me upset, its things i already got taken away from be because of rona this past school year. for instants i wasn't able to perform at the graduation at the college in my county, because IT WAS FUCKING CANCELLED. and ive worked since freshman year to be able to get into that ensemble. also the last spring concert of my sophomore year was cancelled because of rona, which would've been the last time i would perform with all the seniors, besides the graduation performance. and lastly, we all missed out on our Disney world trip. every two years my music department takes a trip to florida (we live in maryland) and we do these workshops and play Disney music for movies and stuff, then the marching band marches around Disney and plays Disney song stands tunes, but guess what, you guessed it, CANCELLED.

but ive really started reading a lot more, like not just wattpad books, because most actual popular wattpad books that aren't fan fics are way too cheesy and shit, so that's good. Ive also really gotten back into music which is good too, and my birthday is coming up so im hoping for a few instruments but who knows. and then ive also had time to bing watch tv shows like no ones business over the past three months and ive probably watched a total of 15 tv shows and finished off a few i started before quarantine.

to conclude my rant, i think ive really started growing into myself, discovering myself and improving some things, although im dealing with a 1+ year relationship break up and a friendship break up, i think like changing for the better, ive started new habits that are good for me, but ive also started a bad eating habit, where i don't eat much at all some days, but that's because of stress and shit so who cares. so overall quarantine has been a rocky road.

oh also, i think the best thing that has come out of corona is the new bonds ive made with my friends, like weve gotten so much closer and i think its because we see how much we miss each other when we cant see each other for a month and a half, which is the longest weve all gone without hanging out. BUT over the past two months (yes i know during quarantine we aren't supposed to see other people, but once beaches and stores started opening it kinda technically lifted the quarantine in my county) ive gone to the beach a lot and went kayaking and paddle boarding a lot too, so summer this year is definitely gonna hit different.