I Think I Love You, Be My Friend

Here it is.

I can’t quite explain it
This spinning, I’m breathless
It won’t go away, but it comes on so fast

How long will this last?
I’m stuck on the edge
While the void sings its siren song
And I can’t come down.

With each step I feel
The snaking breaths of danger
Pulsing hot against my neck
It’s always there, no matter how fast I run
I just want to stop.

Something like a nothing ache
Cancerous and all-consuming,
This rogue invader converted the army
Turned myself against self against me.

These are the nights
I’m terrified, but I don’t know why

My world is under water
And the oxygen is running low.
Still falling with my feet
Planted firmly on the ground.

I can’t make sense of what is happening
I don’t know how to ask for help
But the thoughts are the worst.
They’re there and they’re real.
I say no, I don’t want to
The worst part is I know I really do.

Everything hurts
But it isn’t a pain
And crying about it
Only makes the numbness worse.

There comes a day when
It gets pretty bad
But somehow, you see me
When everything is blind
You get it, you’ve been there
Say you won’t leave me behind

And, god, you’re so strong
From where I am you’re at the top
And you stretch out your hand
Down, just to help me get up.

I still don’t understand
How or why you came that day
But somehow you were there
Knew just what to say
Teach me all the things I should have loved
Because I can’t remember when I stopped

For some reason, it was you
The unlikeliest of heroes
Grabbed my hand and made me see
There is a light (for me, it’s you)
Though maybe it’s not supposed to be.

And when we feel ourselves slipping
Back to the way we were
We know just who to call
Because we’ll pull each other out again.
I think I love you, be my friend.