JADE LUNARIS M.T
To be honest, I hate everything that happens in me.
I've had enough from all of this.
The wind is blowing cold as I angrily kick the stone in my way.
Ginawa ko naman lahat. But still, why things keep messing up?
For the 10th time, I take a look at the test paper I was holding. 74/100 written in bold, huge size. I hate the feeling that it was like shouting in my face saying 'YOU'RE SUCH A FAILURE!'.
I was ranting in my brain. I want to cry hard but I know it wasn't enough.
Life is cruel for it never gives what we really want. Gusto ko lang naman na mag-excel dito sa exam dahil pinaghirapan ko ito, umabot ng madaling araw ang review ko sa pag aakalang tataas o papasa man lang ang marka ko pero sa huli ganito rin pala, bagsak. Palakol lang din pala ang matatanggap ko.
I stop the shuffling music in my playlist in Spotify as my phone beeped. It was a message from my mother.
'Nasaan ka na? Wag ka na muna uuwi. Kung nasa byahe ka na, dun' ka na muna kina Tita Sabel mo ha. Nasabi ko na sa kanya..'
I mentally rolled my eyes. I know she would say this. I know she doesn't want my presence there, in our own house.
Ayaw nya na naman akong pauwiin. Of course, sino ba namang gugustuhing patuluyin ang anak nila kung magkakaroon na sila ng bagong pamilya?
The reason why she sent me off in this place, far from them. Even if I want to stay in our house as I treasure the loving memories of my father, I was left with no choice to live in a apartment. Alone.
Cruel isn't it?
Nakiusap ako sa kanyang palipasin muna kahit isang taon ang pagkamatay ni Papa bago magpakasal sa iba. But after a two months, just two fucking months after the death of my father, she's already planning to marry Tito Roel, bestfriend of my father.
Sometimes I find it hard to believe that she really loved my father even at once when he's still alive.
I can't accept everything. I blame everyone. And that's when I started to distance myself.
Bawat segundo ng buhay ko, gusto kong lumayo. Lumayo sa lahat.
After that, I was just an injected spirit living in a 19 year old host. Every time I bump with someone, I'm expecting a 'condolence' because the truth is I was barely. . . . living.
As everyone is busy tweeting their quotable quotes in twitter, trying to make a change through youtube viral, I was tied-up creating my own universe of peace.
Likes and heart isn't my priority. I don't need attention. I believe that my existence needs no bother from the chaotic world. And I like it that way, I guess.
It was all fine before, I don't need any social media platform to express my thought cause' I have my diary slash ranting app but not until I lost it somewhere.
Either way, I don't want to invest my time with people who think 200+ like button means you're famous. I don't want to engage myself with people who knows how to push you up when you are in the top but step a foot in you when you're already low.
That's why I try to find a place to atleast calm my mind. Luckily, I found one.
I sighed. I crumpled my test paper and throw it away. I diverted my attention to where I am going.
Hapon na bago matapos ang aking klase. Kailangan ko pang hintayin ang paglubog ng araw bago ako makapunta sa lugar na ito.
Malayo pa man ay tanaw ko naman ang big bike nyang nakaparada sa may poste ng ilaw.
BINABASA MO ANG
Light Beyond Boarders
General FictionWhen you see the light from the huge ball of fire goes beyond the boarder, there's man waiting for his girl, 400 ft above unknown. He is Lancelot. A Knight that rides a big bike. An honored man who commit to protect at all cost their place, the brid...
