Reborn

Chapter Eleven

I was woken up in the morning by the sound of my door opening. I heard someone gasp quietly. The sheet was sitting across my hips, my back to the person. I look over my shoulder at them and get angry when I see its Damien. 

"Don't you know how to fucking knock?!" I demand as I sit up, clutching the sheet to my chest. His eyes turned amber as he glared. 

"Why do you have so many scars?" He asks in a hard voice. I rolled my eyes.

"Because I'm a rogue, dumbass. Rogue's get scars." I said before rolling my eyes again.

"Why did you become a rogue then?" 

"Because of you." I spat. His eyes narrowed.

"Me?" 

"Yes. You. If you didn't reject me then I wouldn't have run. I wouldn't have become a rogue." My voice had turned hard.

"You can't seriously be blaming me for that." His voice was getting louder.

"Think about it. If I had stayed here then none of this would have happened. All this?" I gestured largely to myself and my scars.

"Is YOUR fault." I seethed through gritted teeth. He stepped into the room and shut the door behind him, a little more aggressive than necessary. 

"Ever since I felt you die I have been beating myself up. I have loathed myself. My wolf didn't start talking to me until about six months ago." He told me, the hardness in his voice returning.

"Oh boohoo I went without my wolf for 18 years." I rolled my eyes again. Was I being childish? Maybe a little bit. Did I care? Not at all. I want him to hurt. I want him to hurt the same way I was forced to. 

"You were used to it!" He yelled as he pointed at me angrily. 

"Don't you fucking yell at me! You forced me to suffer the greatest pain a wolf can feel and you're wallowing in self-pity! I don't give a shit if you lost contact with your wolf because of a stupid choice you made! You made the decision for me to suffer! I sat there for hours in agony because of you!" I screamed back. I could almost see steam coming out of his ears. 

Get him. Jordan was seething. 

"You knew what it would do to me and you did it anyway! I cannot believe I actually ever cared for you! Every single day for 4 months I would wake up and watch you! My thoughts only ever being of you! I would have died for you! And you threw it all away!" Tears started to fall from my eyes. Damien's eyes were wide and he was silent. 

"Get out. Get the fuck out of my room." He hung his head and left the room without a word. I quickly wiped the tears from my face. I refuse to cry anymore for that lowlife. I heard a knock and the door opened. Ryan stepped into the room.

"Hey. Are you ok?" He asked. That was my undoing. I started sobbing. I couldn't control it. I pointed to a shirt on the ground and he quickly tossed it to me before turning around. I pulled it on and he immediately climbed into bed with me, holding me tightly. 

It had to be at least an hour later before I got a hold of myself.

"How much did you hear?" I asked him. He shrugged.

"Just the end. The rooms are almost completely soundproof and I was walking past. Damien nearly ran into me when he left. He's locked himself in his office." Ryan said gently as he stroked my hair. I nodded absently. 

"Is there a gym in the house?" I asked, changing the subject. Ryan nodded.

"It got added about a year ago."

"Does it have a treadmill?" He nodded again.

"It's big enough to exercise your wolf." He told me. Perfect. That's exactly what I want it for. Ryan left the room and I got changed into some comfy clothes. I met him outside my room and we both made our way into the basement. He pushed the door open and we found it empty. Perfect. 

"Lock the door." I instructed. Ryan looked at me confused but obeyed. I turned to him.

"I'm going to show you my wolf. If you tell anyone anything about it, I will personally murder you. Do you understand?" I asked with the utmost seriousness. Ryan nodded.

"Pinky promise?" I asked as I held up my pinky. He smiled and intertwined his pinky with mine.

"Pinky promise." He turned around and I stripped so I wouldn't ruin my clothes. I shifted on the spot. It felt so good to be in this form. Ryan turned around and jumped back. When he recovered he walked in a circle around me.

"Holy. Fuck." He breathed out. He circled me again.

"You're bigger than Damien." I sent him a wolfy grin. That's the best news I've heard in ages. I trotted over to the treadmill and Ryan sat down with the controls.

"Ok. Bark whenever you want to go faster." He told me and I nodded in understanding. He started off slow and I barked. We kept going up and up until the treadmill couldn't go any faster. It's making me a little out of breath but it's great. I feel so free. Just running. I don't have to think about anything or anyone. I can just run. 

Let me take over. I want to run. I relinquish control and let Jordan come forward. I could feel how happy she was. When she was content she gave me back control. I jumped off the treadmill. Ryan stopped it and I turned to him. I lowered my front to the ground and wagged my tag, the sign for 'play with me'. He laughed before quickly stripping and shifting into his brown wolf. He was smaller than I was but that didn't stop him from tackling me. I got out from under him and got back on my feet.

We played for a good hour. I was having the time of my life. We wanted to see who would win in a fight. Rogue vs Beta. I was starting to gain the upper hand when there was a loud banging on the door. We both quickly shifted back and got dressed. Ryan opened the door and Damien rushed in. 

"What's going on? Why was the door locked? Why did I hear fighting?" He demanded quickly.

"Damien we were play fighting. We wanted to see who would win. It was strictly friendly." Ryan told him. Damien looked over at me, his eyes unreadable. He just nodded and walked out of the room. 

"What was that about?" I asked, confused. 

"I don't know."