vangelia°namjin

ep. 1 - 'pure alpha, kim namjoon'

''namjoon's POV.

How did it felt like, being free? How did it felt like, having your own mind? How does it even feel like, to create your own thoughts?

I am not free, nor have my own words and thoughts. I am trapped inside my own body with my own emotions being held by my heart.

My family didnt allow me to show sympathy, any kind gesture, and nice acts towards anyone. Regardless of their gender, race, class. I was grown up thinking that everyone's reasoning of talking with me was purely out of their desires of using my rank and my money.

That is why, my family sent me to a school which everyone from every class, every economical level, every race was sent to. It was a school that had only one motive;

'Do not discriminate.'

'Discrimination is not being dominant, it is an act of low quality and personality.'

The school's motive did not fit my handmade mind and thoughts at all, it did not fit 'me'.

Since my family realized their mistake in growing me up, they have sent me here in hopes of 'fixing my broken mind and self' and I always tried my best to keep up with the school's motive.

But there were many, many obstacles. Some of them were small ones that were easy to either ignore or solve. But there was one obstacle that always kept my mind busy and annoyed me to my soul.

Kim Seokjin, our omega class president that always ruled the class while being from a mere and low class in society.

It annoyed me how he was supposed to be quietly listening to the class and then graduating without any hopes of getting into college and waiting for his mate, but instead he was always the first in ranks when it came to practice exams, grades and every single competition in the school.

I was annoyed by the fact that a low classed being like Kim Seokjin was, in fact, better than me.

His face, his mind, his whole being was a big slap on my face that showed the harsh reality that he was always, and will be better than me.

I hated him, hated him for 8 years. But also tried my best to not show any bit of this hate towards him. I didn't speak a word with him until 10th grade, I always looked away whenever I felt his gaze on me, which happened alot, and always advised myself to ignore him in any situation.

But his caring and understanding personality never really seemed too baffled with how I acted towards him. He always acted gentle and kind whenever I asked something or got permission for something.

He was the complete opposite of me.

I always wondered, "Why doesn't he just give up on his dreams? He will always be seen as a slut that wants alphas to rip him to pieces. He is low. He is worthless." I couldn't understand him at all.

Towards 11th grade, rumors of him liking me was spread around the school. He did not seem too scared nor surprised by it, so I assumed it wasnt true. Because I couldn't find a single reason for him to like someone who is as toxic and fucked up as me.

My hate slowly shapeshifted into admiring him. I didn't realized this, but whenever he did something unique or cool, my heart skipped 7 beats. I was scared of this, I was scared of these emotions that weren't planted in my heart before.

I was slowly accepting his existence and started to be more comfortable being in the same class as him.

And continued to adore him.