Broken. (A Robron Oneshot)

Broken.

Suicide, that is all that ran through my mind, as I stood on a bridge looking at the distance between where I was stood, and where I would land. It was a long way down, but it would be worth it escape all this pain. It would be worth it to stop hurting people. 30 years old, and I still haven't figured out anyway of blocking these feelings.

I was the son my dad never wanted. He just got lumbered with me. Andy however, Andy was different. My DAD chose Andy over me everytime. Andy took the one parent who loved me away from me, he ruined everything I ever was, and that was when everything went wrong. Dad had beaten me into thinking I'm someone that I'm not. Dad couldn't handle having a son like me. He didn't want a son that liked boys. He wanted a son that liked girls. He made me feel worthless, like I didn't belong. I've never belonged anywhere.

I had it all, I was living with a rich family, I was married into a family with money, in Dad's eyes I would of made it. He would of been proud. He would of said, 'Robert Jacob Sugden, you made it my boy.' I didn't make it though, I never made it. I liked boys and girls, I definately liked girls, but the one thing I liked more than girls was him, and he liked me I was sure of that, only I was married and I didn't want to hurt my wife.

I've messed up more times than most, I killed someone, my brothers wife to be exact, I didn't mean to kill her.. like Andy didn't mean to kill Mum. It just kind of happened. He was the one person there for me throughout the whole ordeal, only it wasn't easy for him either, he was getting bad again, mentally I mean and I can't burden him with my own problems, this is the easiest way. I left a note.

My legs were dangling over the edge over the bridge, thoughts ran through my head, when I heard a car screech to a stop. "Robert?!?!" It was him. The love of my life, I really needed to do this, I could live another day of my life being the family disappointment. I just couldn't do it, but I love him I really did love him, but then everything went wrong.

"I can't do this anymore, I'm sorry..." I spoke, my body shook with sobs as he walked closer, I could smell him, the cheap stuff it always smelt better on him. I couldn't pull cheap off, not after I married my wife, money kind of took my life over, and believe me money is definately the cause of sadness. No money? Sadness. Too much money? Sadness.

"Robert please step away from the edge, I don't know what I'd do without you. Please Robert we can talk this through. You are stronger than this, I know you.." He spoke surely like he knew what this felt like, had he tried this before? It felt wrong to ask, so wrong. I didn't want anybody to be hurting. I choked out another sob as he took another step towards me. I could see his black puffy jacket out of the corner of my eye. I loved him and I didn't want to hurt him.

"I don't want to hurt you.." I cried looking down at the cars going past, everybody just going along in their daily lives. I wasn't like that. I was up here, about to end my daily life. I couldn't stop the tears from falling, I kept thinking about them all, about how I messed him about when in fact I loved him more than anything else, about how my father hated me, about the disappointment in my families eyes. I couldn't lumber him with what I felt.

"Don't do it then. Robert get down please." I could hear the urgency in his voice as I slowly nodded hearing him breath out a sigh of relief, I turned around slowly, and grabbed a hold on his hand. He quickly wrapped his arms around me and dragged me back onto the road. I pulled away from the hug to look into his eyes, they were red and blotchy. I made him cry. I made the love of my life cry, what kind of awful person am I?

"I don't blame you for any of this Robert, it could happen to anybody, but please, oh dear god please talk to me next time please. I couldn't cope without you." I nodded slowly and as he slowly pressed his plump lips onto mine, our mouths moving in time with each other.

I felt someone nudge me, I looked to my side I wasn't back on the bridge, but I was with him. "Everything alright Rob?" I looked into his eyes, Aaron had been through so much since then, I nearly lost him in a car crash, he proved how strong he was and got justice for the abuse he recieved as a child. This man, is the strongest person I know.

"Yeah, just thinking about that time you saved me, and how strong you are. I'm proud to call you my husband Mr Aaron Dingle." I looked at Aaron watching his emotions, how his eyes lit up with each word that I spoke.

"You know I'm no good at soppy stuff Rob" Robert grinned knowing it was his chance, and spoke firmly. I know Aaron."

Aaron shoved Robert slightly but grinned before opening his mouth. "I'm proud to be able to call you my husband too Mr Robert Jacob Sugden. Which is why, I want us to do it all over again. Get the wellie filled with beer, get the family round, lets do it properly this time, and if the police want to show up let them, I mean they are pratically family to us all now..." Robert looked at his beautiful husband and place his hand over Aaron's and smiled before nodding.

"Let's make it official again. Aaron Dingle will you marry me." Aaron laughed and got out of bed and gave Robert the look that said 'of course I will, I've already married you once haven't I dimwit' but Robert loved Aaron so much he would formerly propose everyday till the look ended and he heard Aaron say yes one more time. He'd even propose to his husband when they were planning the wedding, he didn't care that wedding planning was enough proof he wanted to hear his husband say 'I will marry you' one more time.

"Yes Robert I will marry you." Aaron declared as he was once again stood in his wedding suit infront of all his family and friends in the woolpack, and Robert smiled from ear to ear as he placed the ring on Aaron's finger and said his vows once more.