Cease

As the silvery grey sky unfurled into the dying embers of light, the snow slowly descended, blanketing the overwhelming saturation of suffering, the Earth witnessed. As the layers of powder thickened, the suffocating feeling of helplessness became tenfold, wrapping my head into a state of perpetual delusion. The cold, that used to implode memories of inextinguishable laughter, illuminated by candlelight, and warmth of countless comforting embraces, left me insensate. It's all gone now.

Now it left me, feeling an unshakable paralysis, of a painful onslaught of emotions. Things have changed, so much so that all that lay in the past, seemed like an unattainable dream. Taking the steps in the overshadowing darkness, with just the flickering luminescence of a small torch, I could faintly make out the silhouette of the other five volunteers, stark against the shadows of the trees. Amidst the continuous paradoxes that played within the confinement of my head, I could recognise isolated sounds of pain, from beyond the trees. My throat constricted, and my fear pummeled blood to all parts of my body, making my head light. I wanted to run back into the safety of the trees, but I couldn't. I had to redirect my mind. I had to reach the city, to get to the supplies... or the remnants of it.

The trees ended. My eyes darted between the narrow gaps of the trees, and my head felt heavy. The nervous glances that passed between us, seemed like deafening pleas for help. It was as if, the only part of us that had the motive to communicate were our eyes, locked in between the depths of our heads, screaming for us, shaking in fear for us. Taking another step seemed impossible, but in cold determination, my mind orchestrated my limbs to move forward. Defensive, trembling, shuddered through my body, desperate to succumb to fear.

A pungent metallic fume filled my lungs, and I clamped down my teeth, in order to control the involuntary repulsive retch, the took over my throat. Searching in the dying light, I saw nothing, but as my eyes adjusted and focused there was no looking back.

Incomprehensible.

The whole town had been wiped out.

Crumbling. Flattened. Wrecked.

All of the structures that stood tall and proud, lay crushed. A tangle of concrete, metal, and bodies strewn across the lifeless land. The white snow coated everything, in a desperate attempt to hide what had become of it. I couldn't even react to the tears that left a maddening network of trails, across my expressionless face. It was involuntary. How else could I react? No reaction of mine could even signify, the absolute finality the sight encompassed my body with. Annihilation is what lay ahead of me. Complete desolate destruction. It was as if all of humanity's nightmares had been collated and wrapped up in blood of innocents and the screams of those in agony and been presented in front of my eyes.

We all unknowingly stood in very close proximity to each other, desperate for some sort of reassurance. I was supposed to lead them, but nothing was receptive. There were few bodies that lay a couple feet away from us, bloody, and burnt. The sight was at the extent of dehumanising, yet looking away seemed impossible. I could hear the strangled sounds of those in the group, in all attempt not to fall apart. My stomach coiled and twisted, tightly making each breath taxing.

We moved around the bodies stiffly, and walked a small distance, climbing over the rubbled remains of what was probably a home. Soon the silence was ruptured and my ears singled out, raw sounds of prodigious agony. Fearful and uncomfortable we inched together like a wounded pack skeptical of pain.

I saw a pair of grey eyes a foot away from me, in between the rubble. My body and senses stilled. The grey eyes was surrounded by torn, ravaged flesh. At frequent intervals the bloody lips quivered amidst the charred remains of the face. The neck was completely burnt, embossed in large oozing blisters and deep scars. Only half the body was visible, the rest lay under the weight of large twisted metal bars. The chest covered in scraps of material, had deep gashes, frothing with blood which rose and dropped in interrupted ragged intervals, matching the pace of my uneven heart. Slowly from the icy ground the arm rose, pale and blue, grappling at the darkness. Involuntarily my hand reached out, just as a reverberating scream of pain sounded from the bloody lips, making me fall back. I immediately tried to clamber up onto my feet, desperate to run away from the body but nothing seemed to cooperate. The scream was ringing in my head, driving me crazy. I ran. My legs pumping, sinking into the thick snow, trying to reach the retreating figures of the rest of the group. As I ran the distance grew, my senses disintegrated, my eyes darkened, the pain sweltered. 

And then I felt my entire body in contact with the scalding embrace of the snow, and in front of me the darkness had engulfed the dying embers of light.