Begin Again

One - Mackenzie's POV

I was walking though the cafeteria with a lunch tray, which contained a sandwich and a bottle of water, in my hands. As I headed for the exit since I planned to eat outside, I tried not to care that people were staring at me or that I was now alone. The only thoughts going through my mind were:

I hate my life. I hate him. I hate my life. I hate her. I hate my life. I hate myself. I hate my life. I hate everyone. I hate my life. I hate -

Someone bumped into me, causing my thoughts and myself to freeze. My breath hitched as my eyes met the cynical green ones of Parker Smith. A seductive smile formed on his lips as he eyed my face, his intentions so easily sliding across his slimy profile. So many emotions bubbled within me, richocheting off one one another. But one stood out - anger. After a second, he leaned in close to the side of my face and whispered, his voice rough, and his breath prickling my neck,"I had a lot of fun at the party."

The next thing I did was out of my control. I dropped my tray to the tiled floor and grabbed ahold of his tie, twisting it around so that we were face-to-face. Call it harassment, but it's revenge. I was about to knee him where the sun don't shine, but a Marilyn-Monroe-esque shriek made me freeze. In the blink of an eye, I felt a hand rip me off him and the next thing I knew, I was eye-to-eye with Celina Cortez, my ex-best friend. "Back off, you back-stabbing whore!" she growled, shielding Parker away from me. "He's my boyfriend! Haven't you done enough? Or maybe you still want him? Huh? Answer me!"

To say I was hurt was an understatement. Celina used to be my best friend, like the sister I'd always wanted. Before, I would have done anything in my power to make her happy, but now, it's obvious she never even cared about me, or the three years of friendship we had shared. Behind her, Parker was smirking, his facial expressions stained with innocence. I could tell he was eating this up. Two girls fighting over him? His kind of day.

I couldn't take it. My chest was tightening, making it harder for me to breathe. Tears welled up in my eyes, weighing me down even more, but I didn't dare let one fall. I was already humiliated enough.

Digging my nails into my palms, I gritted my teeth, teetering over the edge. Finally, after an enternity had passed, I raised my chin, and said with a sardonic shrug, "He's all yours. You two truly do deserve each other."

Turning around, I walked away, but only until I reached the outside, did I let the tears fall.

People around me stared, their whispers shooting sharp needles through my chest. I sighed, resolving to close my eyes.

A lone thought raced through my mind.

I hate my life.

•••

As I quietly entered the girls' restrooms, I was glad to see that it was empty. I locked the door and made my way over to one of sinks. I tied my hair into a messy bun and I tried not to look at my reflection in the mirror. I already knew my eyes and nose were red from crying and my make-up was ruined. Sniffing, I turned on the faucet and began to wash my face. Once my face was free of my tears and make-up, that was when I took a glance at the mirror. I hated what I saw.

My hazel eyes were puffy and slightly red. Freckles were spread over my nose and cheeks. A few strands of my curly brown hair framed my face. My full lips were set in a grim line. Grim reaper, anyone? I also noticed a small red pimple was forming on my chin. All in all, I'm sure I looked super attractive - not.

After a moment, I let out a cat-like moan of frustration and covered my face with my hands. I marveled on why my life sucked so much. Things weren't supposed to happen this way. Everything was just wrong.

Once again, I felt my chest beginning to tighten, an iron fist gripping my heart. As tears sprung at my eyes, I wiped them away, willing myself not to cry again. Instead, I focused on my breathing. I inhaled and exhaled; listened to the rhythm of my heartbeat as it slowly calmed down.

I was so focused on myself that I hadn't noticed the soft, low snoring at first. But it soon dawned on me that I wasn't alone. Someone else was in one of the restroom stalls and for some strange reason, it sounded like she was. . . snoring?

"What the hell?" I whispered, my frows burrowing. Hestitantly, I went and opened two of the stalls, only to find them empty. I headed over to the bigger stall used for handicaps and found it locked. "Oh crap," I muttered and on impulse, I banged on the door. "Hey! What the hell are you doing in there?" I demanded. "Are you spying on me or something? I know you're in there! Hey! Open up now!"

Hearing no response, I soon became even more angry. I mentally cursed her - whoever the hell she was - and decided to bend down under the stall to get a glimpse of who she was.

What I saw next caused my jaw to drop. It was Copernicus, the mega-freak of the school and it looked like she was passed out, sitting on the toilet. Propped up against the tank of the toilet, Copernicus looked like a classic case of cold-medicine-overdose. There had been rumors going around that she had been experimenting with drugs, and apparently, they were true.

Folded up like origami, Copernicus's expression was oddly serene for a girl who had fallen asleep on the toilet. Platinum hair framed her face like curtains, banking away from unkemptness. How hard was it for a girl to look in a mirror once in a while? Of course, there had been that stupid, but amusing, rumor that Copernicus was a vampire. Who knows? Her pale skin seemed to check out. And the mirror thing? Check, and check.

Peering closer to the ground, I noticed that her backpack, a meager Walmart paper bag, held a single notebook and a couple of bottles, multi-colored pills inside. Scattered across the floor, which already held a candy wrapper, a mascara-stained tissue, and a pad, was change. From the looks of it, she hadn't exactly been saving up for anything big.

A wad of paper was in her hand, evidence of an uneaten chicken patty still in her grasp. A combination of drool and mayonnaise stained her lips, her snoring sounding like a train whistle. Backing away, I closed the stall door.

I didn't really know Copernicus since I had no classes with her and honestly, I didn't care. But I've heard that she was a freak and now. . . I can see why.

Crinkling my nose in disgust, I quickly straightened up and dusted off the invisible lint from my shirt. I was thankful that she was asleep, though. If she was awake and found me in the sad state I was in, that would have made my life a bit more difficult and that was the last thing I needed.

It was in that moment that my phone vibrated in my pocket. I took it out and as I read it, I felt a small smile crept on my face.

Are you okay? Saw what happened. :(

- Colby

Sighing, I typed up a message.

I'm fine. Don't worry about me.

After sending it, I couldn't help, but appreciate the concern that he seemed to always have for me. Colby was my step-brother, but it felt like we were actually real siblings.

My phone's screen flashed with a new message.

BS. I know that whenever a girl says she's fine, she's not.

Despite the state I was in, I couldn't stop myself from letting out a laugh. I was already in a better mood, but I wasn't going to admit it to him.

Ok, Dr. Seuss. I'm not fine. Happy?

After sending the text, he simply replied with a frowny face and I knew that later, I would have to tell him what happened between me and Parker.

But right now, I shoved my phone in my pocket and grabbed my make-up bag. I had a lot more time before the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. And I was definately not going to come out of here until I was at least, decent-looking. And knowing the way I currently looked, it would take a long time.