One Direction Preferences

Is There Somewhere (Harry Styles)

Request** Is There Somewhere (Harry Styles)
Flashbacks

You were dancing in your tube socks in our hotel room
Flashing those eyes like highway signs

Thinking back on a few months ago, I regret ending things with Harry. I sit at home in my head thinking, is that I regret ending our relationship, or do I regret our relationship. Then as I start to think maybe it is that I regret ever being with Harry Styles, I have all these flashbacks, of glories memories that I can’t help but to hold on to; and feeling coming flooding back. Feeling of being loved, wanted, cared for, and wanting him to feel the same things I feel from him. I let these memories and feeling sink in and take over.

“Harry what do you think you are doing?” I asked him as I walk into our kitchen, where he is supposed to be making dinner.
“Im dancing baby. What does it look like I am going?”
“In just your socks?”
“They are tube socks, get it right (Y/N),” he said playfully. “I have my boxers on too.”
“Oh okay babe that makes it better.” I giggle climbing onto the bar stool closest to Harry to watch him cook our meal.
He looked over at me with that killer smile, and his eyes were flashing like a highway signs. I just could no get enough of him, I love him with everything I have. He leans over and kisses me gently on the lips. It was the most gentle of kiss, one that would have to last a life time.

At times I swore that I could feel his lips still on mine. Maybe I really was longing for Harry, longing for the way his lips felt on mine, for his touch, longing just to be in his presents. I light up another cigarette, and of course something as simple as that being Harry back to my brain.

Light one up and hand it over, rest your head upon my shoulder
I just wanna feel your lips against my skin

“If you are lighting one up, hand one over here Harz.”
“You got it baby.”
I watched him as he light of a cigarette and hands it over to me, before he lights one for himself, and I lay down on the bed with my head on the pillow. Harry walks over to his side of the bed and crawls in next to be resting his head on my shoulder. It was blissful just laying there not saying a word, finishing the last breath of our cigarettes. He puts his out and starts to kiss down my shoulder, to my chest, all I wanted from that moment on was to feel his lips against my skin, any part of my skin just as long as he was kissing me.

I remember he kept kissing me all over, and more happened but I did not want to think about that. Our private love life was no a painful memory, all for me, it was not like anyone else knew about us. We hardly went into public together, and if we did it was because we had, I was apart of the One Direction team, why would he want to be seen with me when he did not have to?

White sheets, bright lights, crooked teeth, and the night life.
You told me this is right where it begins

“Baby let’s go dancing?” I asked Harry one night from the balcony of out hotel room; but I knew what he would say.
“Why don’t you go with the girls?”
“You know why Harry, I want to go with you.”
“No one knows about us that can’t happen.”

I can’t tell you how many times we had that conversation, a million maybe? He would always say once I argued with him for to long: 

Why would you want to be down there in the bright lights with the crooked teeth, of the night life, when we have white sheets right here?
He would tell me:
This is right where it begins.
Before we would do sinful things in bed with each other, I miss making those sins with him. Maybe I did not regret the relationship as much as I did ending it. 

But your lips hang heavy underneath me.
And I promised myself I wouldn’t let you complete me
I’m trying not to let it show, that I don’t want to let this go
Is there somewhere you can meet me?

I missed the way his lips would hand very underneath me, just dying to get a kiss, even a small peck upon his lips; he would almost beg. I promised myself when I first got with Harry that I would not let him complete me. I broke that promise after day one, he was my everything.
Now all I am is heart broken, sad, and lonely, I miss Harry more then anything, but all I have is our memories. 
I try my hardest not my hardest not to let it show that I miss him as much as I do, I honestly don’t want to let go of what we had. Was that so wrong of me? I wonder if he ever feels like the same. At work I always catch him looking at me, it always seems like he has longing in his eyes.  I figured that is only one thing I can do, text him and prepare for the worse but hope for the best.
ME: Is there somewhere you can meet me?
HARRY: Dressing room now
I was not expecting him to text me back so fast, he must have had his phone in his hand. As I make my way to his dressing room, I wonder if he has already moved on, did he have his phone in his hand because he has already found someone else? Was he wanting to text me, but just not know what to say. I guess I would soon find out.

Cause I clutched your arms like stairway railings
And you clutched my brain and eased my ailing

I walked into Harry’s dressing room not bothering to knock I knew no one would be in here. As soon as I saw him I my whole body began to shake, and I tripped over my own two feet. He caught me and I clutched to his arms like they were stairway railings. I knew just by his touch that he had a clutch on my brain, and only he could ease my ailing, because it was for him.
“How are you (Y/N)” he asked almost casually, but not meeting my eyes.
“I’ve been better,” I chocked out. Being here just made me feel stupid, and I just wanted to walk out and cry, so that’s what I did.
 
You’re writing lines about me; romantic poetry.
Your girl’s got red in her cheeks, cause we’re something she can’t see
And I try to refrain but you’re stuck in my brain
All I do is cry and complain, because 2nd’s not the same

Once the show started I finally figured it was time to show my face, I was apart of their them that kept them going. Overtime Harry would sing he would look for me, they were the songs he wrote for me. Each line was like romantic poetry all for me, and three thousand other girls that loved him too. I looked out into the crowed and saw girls cheeks get red all because they wanted what I had with Harry, and I threw it away like it was yesterdays trash.
I tried my hardest as the songs went on to try and not think about Harry, or the true meaning of these songs; but he was stuck on my brain. I tried not to cry as I watched the boys on stage, but I let a few tears spill over in my eyes, before I knew it I was crying my eyes out. I left my post to try and get a handle on myself. I kept complaining to myself that I was an idiot he did not want me back, even if he did a second time around would not be the same. He would hit me even more.

I’m sorry but I fell in love tonight
I didn’t mean to fall in love tonight
You’re looking like you fell in love tonight
Could we pretend that we’re in love?

“(Y/N), what are you doing?” I heard some from the voice I knew all to well.
“What am I doing? What are you doing? You are suppose to be on stage singing for your fans, not back here with the stage hand.” I felt like I was yelling but that could just be because of all the norse around us.
“I can’t be on stage when the women I love just ran off crying. You do know that I can see you from where ever I am on stage? What is the matter? Please tell me?” he was begging for me to tell him.
“What is wrong? Really Harry?” he just nodded his head. “I’m sorry, I fell back in love with you tonight, every memory just flooding back. I didn’t mean fall for you all over again, and then you are out there singing like you could fall all over again to. I just wanted to pretend for one more night that we’re still in love.”
“We don’t have to pretend love.”
From that moment on things between Harry and I were never the same.