One shots

Car ride

"So before you go, was there something I could've said to make it all stop hurting" I sang as I look out of the window. The rainy night sky matched my mood as a tear slips down my eye. I reach my hand toward the radio and turn up the song and let down my window. My hair whips in the window and I feel free once again. I sing out to the window letting all my anger, hurt, and frustration out into the song. I break down and feel a hand on my back. My best friend, who was driving, looked at me with pity. I look away and kept singing, once the song was over I sat back in the seat and cried more. "I know it hurts, there is nothing more heartbreaking than to walk in and see what you just saw. Just let it out, that's what this ride is for." I nod and look out the open window again as 'Queen of Silver Linings' by Amy Allen comes on. "No matter what you do no matter what you say I will always find a way to love you." I Sing. I change the song to 'Drowning' by Aaron Doh "somebody save me, I need some help or I might drown." I scream not knowing what else to do.  I feel suffocated in anger and heat, I can feel my whole world come down around me. I feel so alone and sad, I just cry. I cry because of my feelings, I cry because I know I'm not okay, I cry because I know everything just changed, I cry. I let it all out and I sob, I don't know how to control it. My best friend pulled the car over in a restaurant parking lot and held me for a while. We sat there for a while and I cried until I was numb and then everything went numb. "You want something to eat or drink?" I nod and get out the car. We go in and order and as my best friend is talking to me I zone out and stare out the window. Wondering how it would feel if this didn't happen, how happy I would be and how I would never think this could happen. I zone back in and finally pay attention to what the conversation is about. After we eat we get back in the car and go home. I go to the basement with some glass vases I had bought earlier. My numbness was now gone and I needed to do something with the feelings i had inside. I look at the far wall with anger and start throwing the glass at the wall. I scream and hit at the wall next me, I'm not angry anymore, I've just given up at this point. I slide down to the ground and cry more as my best friend comes down the stairs and sits next to me. We just sit there until I'm too tired to feel anything anymore, I get up and go to my room and into my bed, and quietly drift off to sleep.

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A/n: hey, this is a sad one as the first one shot of the book. I'll write more happy, feel good, chapters further into it but for now enjoy. Hope I didn't make you cry too much. Love you guys.