The Guy Without A Name

The Guy without a name.

"The best way to avoid disappointment is to not expect anything from anyone. "

I'm crying in a bench when someone tap my back for comforting me. I looked up. He saw me crying but he smiled. He say those words without even know the truth.

I'm still sobbing.

"Don't cry everything has a purpose" then he smiled again. Binigyan niya ako ng panyo at tinanggap ko naman ito.

"Malinis ba to?" I asked. Then he replied. "Yes, it's clean and don't worry I won't judge you" saka uli siya ngumiti.

Lahat ng mga binitiwan niyang salita ay nakatatak sa aking isipan. Yes. He was right. Life was never meant to be easy.

Nakangiti akong napatingin sa kanya ngumiti din ito bilang tugon. Until I said goodbye and thank you.

Nakalimutan kong ibigay ang panyo sa lalaki. He is very kind, gentleman and respectful guy. He knows to comfort everyone. Even though we don't know each other I felt like I'm comfortable with him. He's a stranger afterall.

Pumasok ako ng isang coffee shop. Beautiful and quite amazing. The ambiance is good. Napatingin ako sa isang table nang magcouple. They are both happy alam kung mahal na mahal nila ang isa't-isa. Napatingin naman ako sa isang mesa na may tatlong magkakaibigan. They looked so very happy sharing their memories back then when they are in highschool.

Napadpad ako sa isang sulok dala-dala ang kapeng inorder ko. A brewed coffee. Gusto kong pumesto sa isang gilid so that everybody will never ever notice me. That's my life. I don't shared problems to everyone even my own parents. I felt like I'm the burden of their lives. Masaya na sila bat ko pa sila bibigyan ng problema.

Napaiyak nalang ako hindi dahil sa lasa ng kapeng iniinom ko o di kaya sa mag-isa ako ngayon kundi dahil sa akin. I don't care kung may makakarinig man sa akin basta gusto ko lang mailabas to dahil ayaw ko na to the point na sukong suko na ako.

"What ever makes you mad, leave it. What ever makes you smile, keep it."

Napatingin ako at pinunasan ang mga luhang pumapatak sa aking mukha. Binigyan na naman niya ako ng panyo.

"I think you need it" nakangiti na naman itong nakatingin sakin. Bago ko kinuha ang panyo tinanong ko muna ito kung malinis ba at tinawanan na naman ako. Just like what he answered me back then.

"Can I seat here? Wala na kasing vacant eh!" Napatingin ako. He's right wala na ngang ibang bakante at tanging ito nalang. Madaming tao narin pala di ko manlang napansin kasi panay ang iyak ko kanina. Nilapag niya muna ang kape niya saka ito umupo.

"Don't make a permanent decision for a temporary emotion"  why'd he always giving me a quotes and a smile on his face.

"Sometimes I keep my feelings to myself because it's hard to find someone who truly understands me."  Sabi ko sa kanya. He gave me his smile again. May kinuha siyang Cellphone at isang earphones.. Nilagay niya sa tenga nito at ang isa naman ay nasa sakin. Hindi na ako umarte.

"Once I put on my earphones, my life becomes a music video" Nakatingin ako sa kanya. He closed his eyes siguro dinadamdan niya yung kanta ni Maximillian na Beautiful Scars na may ngiti sa kanyang labi. Nang matapos ang kanta nakatingin lang ito sa akin.

"You don't need to cry everyday. Alam kung may dinadamdam ka. Kasi ang luha parang pawis lang yan. Hindi man parehong galing sa mata pero parehong tumutulo kapag pagod kana" may lungkot ang mga matang nakatingin ito sa akin. Naramdaman ko na naman ang guilt dahil may isang taong nadamay na naman sakin even though he doesn't know the truth.