Finding Myself Again

Chapter 7: Tears in my Heart

Soo shorter chapter today? Filler maybe? It's just something to get the plot along and throw some Gabriel salt into the mix lmao. Why didn't anyone tell me I was spelling Adrien's name wrong?? Did you secretly laugh to each other at my idiotic spelling mistake that every true Miraculer knows not to do? *Offended noise*

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Marinette waits until the door shuts all the way before bursting into tears. She sets the cookies and tea onto her desk and throws herself onto the chair in front of it. Her head falls back with her eyes closed as the sobs overtake her body.

“Bug? Why are you crying?” Plagg flies out from where he slept and lands on the desk in front of her. The Guardian opens her eyes, staring at nothing.

“I think because I’m actually able to feel about what happened back in January, about what happened in August without the constant fear of getting akumatized.” She squeezes her eyes shut. “It’s just... everything feels to be crashing down. Without Adr-Adrien to hold back Lila, she took things way too far, causing me to move. But I want to be in Paris. It’s my home.”

Tikki sets herself down next to her counterpart and says sadly, “Paris isn’t your home, Mari. It hasn't been for a long time, and I think you know that.” Yes she does, but that doesn’t mean she has to admit it.

The bluenette opens her sketchbook and starts drawing a jacket for Jason. The room is filled with the sound of the pencil scratching against the paper and the soft hums that escapes Marinette’s throat. When the design is complete, she goes to one of her suitcases to get the fabric needed for the jacket. Thanking her luck that she thought to pack several yards of brown faux leather for experimenting, she also grabs thin dark red cotton for the interior.

The hours fly by, and Marinette continues to cut, pin and sew the jacket piece by piece. By 8:00, she’s almost done when Alfred knocks on the door.

“Come in!” She calls, her mouth filled with pins as she adds the finishing details onto the article of clothing. The butler opens the door. “Breakfast will be ready in a half hour.” He looks at the lump of brown and red in her lap. “What’s that?” She ties off the thread, finishing and holding it up to Alfred.

“I made a jacket for Jason! I woke up at two-ish this morning and got lost, so he helped me get back to my room. After he left, I couldn’t go back to sleep, so I took some faux leather I brought for practice and made him this. I’m pretty sure I got his measurements correct…” her teeth worry her bottom lip and her eyes turn from the jacket to Alfred standing in the doorway. “Do you think he’ll like it?” He unfreezes and smiles down at her.

“Of course, Miss. Marinette. Master Jason would love it.” If he knows what’s good for him. After what Jason found out this morning, Alfred did some of his own research. And now he wants to skin a certain cat, preferably alive, but is unable to because he seems to have vanished back in August. Someone must’ve beat him to it and that somewhat irks him.

Marinette smiles up at him, relieved at the statement. When he turns to leave, she calls out from cleaning up the discarded supplies, “can you wait a second while I clean up? I’d like to get downstairs before Jason and also help make breakfast.”

Alfred turns back. “You don’t have to help, Miss. Marinette. I can do breakfast myself. Besides, you need to rest.” She laughs.

“I think I got more rest last night than I got in the past month. 12 hours straight? That’s completely unheard of. I have so much energy that I don’t think I have to make my morning energy concoction, and not have to sleep until next week.” She tosses all the trash into the can underneath her desk and stands. “Okay. To the kitchen!”

Alfred smiles at her enthusiasm and leads her to the kitchen. She trails behind him, gazing at all the art and statues that litter the halls. “Why isn’t there anything on the stairs?” He half turns towards her as he answers.

“I’ve learned a long time ago not to leave anything sitting on the steps. You’d never know what could happen in this household. Once, Miss. Stephanie and Master Dick got the idea to slide down the steps on a mattress. Another time, Master Tim fell asleep while climbing the steps and broke a priceless vase.” He shrugs. “So now, I try to keep expensive things off the floor. Unless it’s in a room.” He smiles wryly over his shoulder. “So welcome, Miss. Marinette, to the Wayne Manor, where all of its residents are slightly insane and a lot chaotic.”

Meanwhile in Paris…

Gabriel stares at the painting in his office, wondering what the fuck he did wrong. His wife is in a magically induced coma with only one known way to get her out and it’s damn hard to get it, his son’s been missing for a month and a half and there’s no lead to where he is, his assistant and fellow villain is sick from the same magic that put his wife under, and finally, his son’s classmate that he’s been trying to akumatize for years moved out of Paris and to the states.

He finds himself thinking, and not for the first time, that maybe he should just give up. Chat Noir disappeared around the same time his son did- did he take Adrien?- and Ladybug only comes out to fight and purify the akuma’s he’s sent, along with three other miraculous holders - Yellow Jacket, Firedrake, and King Cobra. With the four of them, the fights are always short, not giving him any openings that he can use against them.

So now, he stands in his office, watching as his life starts to crumble around him. He stands there, pretending that he doesn’t see the wreckage his decisions have made. He stands there, wondering if he’s already lost the war he’s started, and he just can’t see it.