[EN] Unexpected Eletricity (an Apex Story)

Chapter 5

I see Natalie walking away from the bar counter, her hands over her ears. I decide to approach, while Ajay catches up with her.

''Are yuh okay?'', Che shouted at her, trying to be heard over the music.

''Oui, pardon. I'm just going outside. I have a headache'', replied Natalie.

''It's okay Che, I'm gonna go with her.''

As soon as we step outside, I see her softening. We sit on a concrete railing.

''I'm sorry, I can't tolerate ze noise... I feel like I'm depriving you of your evening, I feel bad.''

''Naaah, chica, I was bored anyway.''

''You were bored? I thought you liked zis kind of environment. You know... dancing, partying... all zat.''

''Yep, but partying is boring when you don't share the moment with someone you like. I prefer to do nothing and be with you.''

Nooo Silva, don't start flirting with her. Che is right, she deserves better... The problem is that with Nat I feel so well that the words come out on their own. I feel like I can be who I really am, without being judged in return.

''I like to spend time with you too'', she said, giving me a shy smile.

I look away and think of a way to open up to her.

''Except for you and Che, I don't get along very well with the others. They don't understand me, for them I'm just a loco. And still, even Che, which is for me the closest thing to a sister I have... she doesn't really know me.''

I remain silent for a moment. Natalie does not say anything either, but I know she listens carefully.

''I was an unbalanced niño who can't stay still one sec', and my parents never accepted that. By dint of note their disappointment, I lost the will to justify how I am. I just prefer... avoiding having to explain myself. All the wild things I do just for adrenaline rushes... I think it's to stop thinking, just for a moment. All the thoughts that keep spinning in my head, it's driving me crazy. But the more I get older, the more I realize that I can't keep running away constantly... That I don't choose the right solutions to solve my problems...''

She put her head on my shoulder.

''You know, chica... Before the Apex Games, I hardly used drugs. I've tried it a few times for competitions... It was so damn easy: unlimited stims, courtesy of Silva Pharmaceuticals.''

I spit that last sentence with bitterness in my voice. Maybe I would not be so fucked up if I was born into a balanced family that cares about other things than cash.

''But now... my drug use is written in the contract. This is what was established, to create my character. They told me that they had developed a machine that would constantly filter my blood and that it would reverse any adverse effects on my health. Mmph... The problem is, it doesn't remove the feeling of addiction. I even started taking some, outside of the arena...''

I look down, ashamed.

''And that fuckin' freaking me out, Nat, 'cause... I think I'm afraid I won't be able to feel really alive without that. To live only through Octane... or to become only him.''

Was it really a good idea to tell her all that? Aggh, pendejo, now she will only pity you.''

''Oh, Octavio-''

''Excuse me Nat'', I said to her before she could continue her sentence.

I stand up quickly and get ready to leave when she grabs me by the arm.

''I'm so glad you told me zat, don't regret it, please.''

I wrap her in my arms. She hugs me very tightly, on tiptoe. The feeling of shame evaporates. She steps back a bit, and says softly:

''I know Octane's face... but it was not with him zat I just talked.''

She starts to take off my headgear, very slowly, as if to get my approval. I let her continue, and she takes off my glasses then my mask. I do not even remember the last time someone saw my whole face. She said nothing for awhile. Does she like what she sees? Nat gives me the sweetest smile.

''I would love to continue getting to know Octavio. Ze real Octavio, without ze mask.''

My heart is literally melting. This one is not like the others, Silva. Don't let her get away from your life.

***

Cheesy moment : just want to make a special shoutout to Mega985, who support me since the beginning of my french fanfic, and to Doomzilla12Foxy, who left me a lot (well, a lot is kinda an euphemism at this point) of comments. It's really appreciated guys. :3

See ya!