"Best! Papicture tayo!" Aya ko sa aking bestfriend. Agad ko siyang hinila sa kanyang braso dahil baka takbuhan pa ako. Paano ba naman kasi allergic ata siya sa camera. This will be our first picture together.
"Okay," sagot niya sa akin. Tama ba ang narinig ko? Pumayag siya.
Naramdaman siguro niya na mamimiss ko siya ng sobra pagkatapos ng aming graduation. Di rin naman kasi ako sigurado kung madalas pa kaming magkikita. I know he will prepare for his board exam after our graduation I just pray that we will remain close as we are right now. Yung tipong lahat ng nakakahiyang pangyayari sa araw ko ay masasabi ko nang walang filter sa kanya.
Pareho na kaming ngumiti sa harap ng camera. Inakbayan niya ako habang naka peace sign naman ako.
...
Seeing our old photo made me miss him, kamusta na kaya siya? It's been how many years? two three? four? five?
I started reminiscing on the past. I remember how we started to become friends. He was quiet most of the time and barely talks. Pero madaldal kapag nakapalagayan mo ng loob. I felt like I found a brother in him. We used to talk about anything under the sun. We started to become bestfriends. I have other bestfriends but he is favorite, though sometimes he is being difficult.
I thought we will always be on each other's side but twist of fate came.
"I'm leaving," aniya. Nagimbal ako sa sinabi niya di koi yon inaasahan. Why would he leave?
"Can't you just stay?" tanong ko.
"I can't," sagot niya sa akin.
There were so many questions in my head but I can't utter any. My emotions clouded my mind. How am I supposed to live the way I used to be knowing someone I lean on will not be there.
"Stay for me," I pleaded. I was quite hesitant to say it but I did. I was hoping that I was enough to make him stay.
"I'm sorry, you're important to me but I have to do it," hingi niya ng tawad saka ako tinalikuran.
What I did was futile, I might even do the same if I was him but I can't help but get hurt. We have been friends since I can't even remember when pero bigla na lang siyang mang-iiwan. I honestly felt betrayed.
Why is it so hard for me to talk to him? He left when I asked him to stay. I really felt hurt that time. Why can't just forget everything. There's no one to blame but myself.
"Kamusta ka na?"
Not good, I have a hard time today.
"I'm doing fine,"
Good to hear that.
"Won't you answer me?"
Because I want you to miss me so bad that you'll decide to come back.
"Are you that mad?"
No, that's not it.
"Do you hate me?"
No, that's never gonna happen.
He tried to keep in touch with me by sending messages but I ignored all of it. Maybe if I give him a cold treatment he'll come back, it was delusional of me to believe that. The more I ignored his message the more he became distant until he stopped sending messages. It was really my fault that our friendship ended up like this.
I regret ignoring him. Every time I receive a message from him, my hands were itching to respond. It was because of me and my stupid pride that I didn't. I miss him but I couldn't tell him, I want to see him but I'm afraid. I'm afraid that he already forgot about me.
...
"Kamusta na kayo ng bestfriend mo?" The people who knew us keep on asking me about you.
"Sinong bestfriend? Mayroon ba ako nun?" Patawa-tawang sagot ko.
I acted like I didn't knew you at all, but the truth is I just don't have any idea what's going on with your life.
I tried to be friends with others, akala ko kapag ginawa ko 'yun di na kita maiisip. It made me miss you more, I can't be me when I'm with them. They couldn't understand my quirks, my likes and dislikes. I was looking for someone like you in them. I feel like I don't belong in their circle, everything was different.
Maybe if I forget about you it will hurt a little less. Who am I kidding? The more I try to forget the more I miss you. I just can't let go of you.
There were times that I cried myself to sleep because I miss you too much. Sinisilip ko rin ang bahay niyo hoping I will see you there.
...
I want to have a glimpse of your life now that I was not in it.
I stalked your social media account, wondering who are you friends with. Are you okay now? What's keeping you busy, are you still the same old you? Do you still like watching anime, do still read books. Are you still playing the guitar? Do you still see me as your bestfriend? Because for me you still are.
I know this will come to an end, soon the cold days will all be gone and we could start over again. Our connection will bloom like flowers in spring. I hope you could wait for me. I just need a little more time. Please wait a little more. I just need more courage to face you.
...
I could feel my heart heaved, I was definitely happy to see him. I didn't know I miss him this much. I ran towards him and hugged him tightly. I never hugged him before I didn't know that it feels good.
"Okay ka lang?" tanong niya sa akin. I can't help but get teary eyed habang kumakain kami. I can't take my eyes off him.
He did gain weight since the last time I saw him, he even had a clean cut which he used to hate.
"Na miss kita," sabi ko sa kanya. At last I was able to say it to him.
"Ang arte mo, pero namiss din kita. Akala ko habang buhay mo na akong di papansinin," sabi niya.
"Alam mo naman mahilig mag inarte 'tong best friend mo," biro ko. I struggled saying the word best friend I don't even know if he still see me as one.
"Kung di ka pa naligaw di ko kokontakin," reklamo niya.
"I'm sorry," I muttered. I let my tears escape my eyes.
"Hala! Bakit ka umiiyak? Best! Tumigil ka nga baka isipin nila pinaiyak kita," natatarantang sabi niya. Natawa ako sa naging reaksyon but I was still crying. I miss this reaction of his.
I cried even more when he called me 'Best'. I felt relieve, ako lang pala ang nag-iisip na di na niya ako bestfriend. All my hesitation and fears was all for nothing. Inabutan niya ako ng tissue upang ipunas sa luha ko. He gently tap my head as he gave me a gentle smile.
"Don't ignore me again," he muttered.
I nodded at him, I won't do it again. I'm not stupid to make the same mistake again. It is never too late to reconnect with people you hold dearly.
Finally spring day has come.
<End>
Author's Note
Thank you for reading. I know this is short but I hope you appreaciate it. This story is somewhat related to me but I altered some parts since I find those things too personal XD.
