AUBREY

nine

[Cain's POV]

Gnawing, thirsty guilt bites at me, snaking its way into my heart. The heavy, crushing weight of my past and my future builds and builds, blocking my path to breathe. Guilt: something so fickle and basic, but so heavy, holding the weight of the world. An emotion that shows remorse, proves that you're a good person, that you are righteous.

Looking over at Aubrey makes the slithers of guilt pile together into something so strong, that every inch of me shakes. For what I've and done, and for what I will do. Judging by the every pinch of guilt swimming through my veins, I can bet I'm not a good person. If anything, I'm one of the few that are rotten. In the world, there are people who seem evil - their exterior surface being shallow, that you take their word for it. Beneath their surface, they're all talk, and their soul stays as pure as the rest of us. However, there's a few of us that are truly black and white, and every fibre of our being is as dark as it gets.

Aubrey's laugh dances over the open area to my ears: soft and melodic. Her living, present happiness only increasing the crushing weight on my lungs until I'm not sure I can even breathe anymore. A clawing reach pulls into my head: maybe it would be better, a good recompense if I were to just let myself leave this reality - this world - to pay back for everything I've done. Then again, that would be taking the coward's route out, it wouldn't equate to compensation for the things I've done. My heart swells at the consuming thoughts, devouring my mind into open vulnerability. Small gasps escape my mouth as my vision blurs, my hands rushing to find something to clutch on, only to be held by a sturdy pair of hands. I slowly drag my eyes up from the ground to meet with a pair of green eyes and a tan face, my vision becoming slightly clearer. The stranger's messy, brown hair floats a little in the breeze, his eyes narrowing in slight concern. For a small moment, I let myself relax in his hold, let myself relax in safety. But then I remember that someone like me, someone so devilish, doesn't deserve the comfort of safety, and my body tenses, my hands snatching away from his grip. "Thanks, but unnecessary."

He scoffs incredulously, glancing me over; my body still shaking visibly, I attempt to internally calm my nerves down. "In my opinion, it didn't seem that way, buddy."

"Good thing I didn't ask for your opinion," I retort, letting out a sigh.

"Normally," he says slowly, "I don't make a habit out of being nice to dicks, but I'm not willing to be one myself if I left you in the middle of a panic attack-"

I hold up a hand to stop him, staring at him in disbelief. "It was not a panic attack-"

"Yes, it was."

"No."

"Definitely was."

"Then you're blind or delusional."

A slow smile spreads across his face, "I think you'll find out sooner or later that I have impeccable vision, so I must be delusional. Especially if we're having this conversation."

Annoyance tugs at me for this conversation, a scowl written on my face. "Name?"

He takes out a hand, leaving it in mid air, ready for me to shake. "Eli, you?"

I take his hand, giving it a firm shake - maybe a subconscious play to seem like the ball is in my court. "Cain."

"At least you're not leaving me hanging for a while like the other girl," he remarks, nodding in Aubrey's direction. I follow his gaze, my own staying stuck on hers. We had been split into activities based on our subjects; she'd been in her group for half an hour, scowling at the other members as they carry out their tasks, whilst she sits away. Even with her scowl, her face stays beautiful and defined, her icy gaze gleaming under the beams of light. I must have been staring for too long, though, as Eli's slow smile morphs into a wicked grin.