9 YEARS OLD
REMY
"I'll see you later, baby, I love you." my mom says to my step dad, Robert. I watch them kiss. "I love you too." he says. She smiles. "Bye, Karly." she says to my half sister, waving at her. Karly's four and is her and Robert's daughter. "Bye." Karly softly says, waving at her. My momma cuts her eyes at me. "What you looking at me for?" she asks. "No reason." I mumble. She never tells me bye. She throws up her middle finger. "This shit better be clean when I get off! Fix your face before I break your jaw!" she yells at me. I wipe the tears from my eyes. "Okay, mom." I mumble. She stares at me like I disgust her then draws back and punches me in my jaw for no reason. I scream out in pain and back away from her as she curses me out. What did I even do to her? "Damn, bitch, I hate you!" she screams, then shoves me. I watch as she storms out the house.
I walk into the restroom and close the door. I sigh, staring at the now forming bruise on the left side of my face. "I hate you too." I mumble. I know she can't hear me but it makes me feel somewhat stronger by saying that.
A light knock on the door distracts me from my thoughts of growing up and getting rich and never having to come here again. "Who is it?" I softly ask. "It's daddy." Robert says, obviously drunk. Daddy? This nigga ain't my daddy.
I open the door. "Sir?" I ask. He hands me a bag of ice. "Sorry about that." he says. "Why you being nice?" I mumble, placing the bag on my jaw. He steps in and locks the door behind him. "Karly is asleep." he whispers in my ear, then kisses it. I tense up. "What are you doing?" I ask, wiping my ear. I step away from him. He grips my Dora tee shirt and yanks me to him. His lips connect with mine. "What are you doing?" I scream, trying to fight him off of me. He slams my body down in the tub. "Damnit, Remy, shut up!" he yells, then punches me in my eye. I scream out in pain as his heavy fist collides with my face.
"You through talking now?" he yells, holding his fist above my nose. "Yes." I sob. He kisses my busted lips then takes my Dora tee shirt from off of my body. He glances at my chest then chuckles. "Little mosquito bites." he says, laughing. I cover my face with my hands. "Why are you doing this?" I manage to ask through my tears. "Shut up." he says, pulling my pajama pants down, then my panties. He stands and pulls his underwear down.
I scream out of fear. I've never seen one of those in real life before. "No... Robert, please don't!" I beg him. "Shut up!" he growls, then grips a hand full of my hair. He shoves it inside of me, causing me to scream. I feel like I'm dying right now. I wish I was dead more than anything.
He just finished taking my virginity. I can't stop crying. I feel so dirty. I've never felt so small and worthless before. He bends over and kisses my lips. "Clean yourself up." he demands. "And quit crying and shaking." he adds. He throws a stack of money at my face. "If you tell anybody this shit, I'll kill you." he says, then walks out.
I weakly stand and walk to the mirror. I break down crying, staring at myself. How could this happen to me? I'm only nine. Why is my life so hard?
I limp over to the tub and clean the blood from out of it. I grab the money he gave me then walk to my room. I throw it in my drawer then ball up in my bed. "Remy." he whispers. I jump, staring at him standing at the door. He walks over to my bed. I scoot away to the headboard. "Please don't." I beg, holding my knees to my chest. "You liked that five hundred dollars, didn't you?" he asks. I ignore his question. "Keep your mouth closed and it's more coming." he says, then walks out.
I scream then throw my lamp to the wall. I want to run away so badly. I stand and go to my closet. I grab the few tee shirts and jeans my momma did allow me to wear then throw them in my school backpack. I take the money he gave me then put it in my bag. I step out of the room and into the living room. I open the front door, only to be stopped by my momma. What the hell she doing here?
"Where the fuck you going?" she growls, gripping my hair. "No where!" I exclaim, crying my ass off. She sniffs me. "You little fast bitch! You been fucking in my house? You nine years old out here like that?" she screams, then throws me in the house. She locks the door. "No, mommy, no!" I scream. She stomps me in my eye. I roll over in pain, holding it as she delivers punch after kick to my body, not caring where she gets me at.
She stands back up. "Now take your hoe ass in that room!" she growls. I weakly stand. My eyes connect to Robert's as I walk out. "You see that hoe, fucking in my house?" she yells at him. "She fast as fuck, baby! Nine years old and a hoe already!" he exclaims.
I stop dead in my tracks. I can't believe them. What's the point of telling the truth? Things will only get worse because nobody will believe me.
I just want to kill everybody in this house, including myself. I hate my life
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