Claudia Phantomhive

The White of Her Life

It's cruel don't you think? How people tend to control your life more than you do. Everyday as you step out to take a breath you feel their hands on your throat as you smile and act all prim and posh.

What great bullshit

And now as I walk down the aisle--at nineteen years of age , a strong grip on my forearm with my tears threatening to fall, I know, I couldn't get away from this. This is what I've been bestowed upon. My fate, some people would say. Maybe it is but is it really all there is to my life? To be sold of to a rich young man and be married for life just for what? Money? Name? Family ties?

You'd think that I would not let such thing happen but even such things, such as my own life, are out of my hands. To be fair to my parents, they did set me up with one of the richest man in all of England. He has the looks, the money, and the fame. Just what my parents wanted.

"Smile, Claudia" My mother hissed in my ear as she tug my arm down to my husband-to-be. I frowned deeper which would certainly earn me a slap later but future problems are for my future self to take care of. Right now, I have a wedding to participate in, unwillingly.

What felt like the shortest walk I had, I came face to face with him, Mr. Augustus Phantomhive-- a man of twenty years of age. Charming, I'm sure but do I know him? Frankly, this is the first time we met. I gave him a cold stare, a trick I learned from my father, and raised an eyebrow at him as he held out his hand, a habit I picked up from my mother. He smiled, seemingly ignorant to my passive stance.

"My lady" he greeted. I was in no absolute way going to hold onto his hand and answer his words but my mother's pinch to my side and my father's glare was enough to bring my pride down. I've got no other choice. "Mr. Phantomhive" I greeted back, albeit a bit more formally.

He took my hand and gently pulled me into his arm. For once, I wished I was back in my mother's grip. For once, I wish I wouldn't have to leave them. I was about to step on a whole new life of nothing but being a lovely wife for a man I don't even know. I knew I was greater than that. I just don't know how I could show it.

The ceremony passed by and I haven't even noticed. The whole time, my ears were ringing as my hands trembled. Fear of what the future would be consumed me whole. I spare a glance at my parents and all I saw were a couple hungry for power that they will their only child to be the sold off.

The wedding ended too soon. My now husband kissed me chastely before earning a loud roar of approval from the crowd. I couldn't even bear to look at them. The ring felt like chains on my finger and the white gown I'm suited in, the only white thing in my life if I'm being honest,felt heavier than it actually is. I was trained to always have my poise but each pressing minute makes me want to arch my back in a slump of a defeat while my husband shook the hands of aristocratic men from all over England.

We mingled for a while and some time this night, mother pulled me aside and slapped me for my actions. "Those were not the actions I taught you, young lady! Refresh yourself and go back out there. I expect you to be mingling with your guests when I look your way" she threatened before leaving me.

The slap was numb. I barely felt it for the pain inside was far more superior. I was not ready, can they not see it? I did as I was told and, fortunately, we were to go home when I got out the loo. When I realized where I would be heading home today, my stomach dropped.

A look of horror must have showed on my face by the way everyone was looking at me with concern. Augustus took my hand quietly with a small frown. I almost scoffed at the look on his face. He doesn't want me. He is only here for the pure reason of creating more power in his name. After all, he married me for my last name and inheritance, not for love.

Not that, I believed in such things. It would only be easier for me to tell that I chose the marriage out of love. Not that I was forced into it with a blackmail of having myself killed by the morning. I sighed once again when I saw the pointed stare father was giving me. Deciding that I valued my life, I sent a quick smile at Augustus' way and letting him take me home.